“You're going to do that all by yourself, are you?”
I shrug. “What’s it matter as long as you get their heads in a box at the end of the day?”
She sniffs and sits up to study me. “You sound a bit like your husband, you know that?”
This time, she looks almost impressed. I wait, holding my breath, for her to answer.
“It was two of your ex-fiancé’s brothers and one of the council members… Bach, maybe. I hadn’t spoken to him before.”
I finally breathe and nod once. “Thank you for telling me. I know this is all terrible. You can talk to me if you want. You were there the day Adrian saved me, you saved me, so you know I’ve been through the same things.”
She jabs her fork into her salad hard a few times. “Yeah, maybe. Does it go away?”
“What?”
“The fear. Before, I feared nothing. Now, it’s like I wait for them around every corner. As if they will pop out to finish what they started.” Her voice wavers like an old record, scratching and breaking on the end.
I want to draw her into a hug, but I know she doesn’t want to be touched right now. Instead, I settle for facing her on the stool. “It goes away…with some distance and some time. Be patient with yourself as you heal. Once your body no longer shows the scars, the mental ones can leap up and grab you long after.”
She scans my face, but I don’t know what she’s looking for. After a moment, she seems satisfied and eats another bite of her salad.
I won’t fail Andrea like I failed Rose. It’s as if the universe is giving me a chance to right my wrongs. If I had left with Rose when she asked me to the night of the ball…she might not be dead right now. We might still be together.
A tiny voice asks if I’d give up Adrian for that. Because if I hadn’t gone to that party, I’d have never met him. It’s not a reality I want to consider, so I choose to ignore the voice and focus on Andrea. “You should tell him. He hates that you got hurt because of him, and he needs to feel in control.”
She jabs her fork into the salad again. This time, the tines scratch against the bottom of the bowl. “No. It’s not his fault, and he doesn’t get to diminish the role I do on our team because he needs vengeance. He’s not the one who got hurt. I am. So it’s my revenge to take, not his.”
I love the stone-sharpened edge to her voice. Since we started talking, it’s gotten stronger, bolder, like the Andrea I remember from before. She can get that woman back again, or she can turn the battered woman into someone even better.
If anyone can get past this and move on with her life, it’s Andrea. Especially if she lets her twin help her. But I don’t mention it, not when she’s only just started opening up to me.
After a long silence, she lets her fork fall into her empty bowl and shoves it across the granite. “Can I ask you something now since you are all up in my business?”
I swallow hard, my food rolling around in my belly uncomfortably. “I think so. But I reserve the right to walk out if I can’t answer it.”
She tilts her head like fair enough. “Why did you run? We all thought you were happy here.”
Involuntarily, I slide my hand across my lower belly, letting my fingers splay low. It’s not as if I can feel the baby yet or even a bump at the sign of him, but it comforts me all the same.
Her eyes dip down to my hand and then flash back up to my face. “Oh, I see. Does he know?”
I shake my head once, tucking my chin.
She hops off the stool, puts her bowl in the sink, and ambles toward the door. “Tell him soon, or he’ll take it as another secret between you. And none of us will survive another fallout.”
14
ADRIAN
I button my jacket and run my hand through my hair one more time. Despite my attempt, I know I look sloppier than I ever have walking through these doors. This is business, and I never let my personal life impede my business.
It doesn’t matter, though, since my office has an en suite bathroom, and I keep a few changes of clothes stashed here in case I need to spend the night. At one point, I’d kept a room here, but the security is harder to control with so many people coming in and out every day.
Kai follows me through the locked door down the long corridor that leads to the fighting ring and into the offices I keep there for myself and my men to use as needed. The casino usually runs itself, requiring minimal oversight from me. Kai keeps things going as needed with help from Michail when necessary.