“How did you even get a pregnancy test in here? You said you took it the day you left, so…who brought it to you?” He rounds and pins me with his sharp gaze.
Shit. I’m not going to risk lying to him. Not when my baby’s and my life could still be on the line. At the same time, I don’t want to put Kai on his bad list any more than he already is. But still, I resolved, Kai is a grown man who can defend himself… “Kai brought it to me. I ordered him to on the conditions of me saving his life, and you giving it to me. He didn’t seem like he wanted to if that matters.”
He waves at the test on the bed. So innocuous. A few inches of white plastic, yet…it’s changed both of our lives completely. “Did he know?”
I shake my head frantically, hands up in surrender. “No, of course not. I didn’t want to tell him before I told you. He didn’t know, and he didn’t help me escape either.”
His eyes narrow, and he steps toward me. A hound on a scent. “Who did?”
I’ve got no problem throwing that old bitch under the bus…not after what she did to me. What I had to do to protect myself. “The cook. She gave me supplies, brought me a phone. It turns out she was a spy for my father…but I don’t know for how long.”
He drops his gaze, no doubt calculating. “The cook…that explains why she quit suddenly. I tasked Kai to look into her, but she is just one name on a very long list of suspects.”
This conversation is not turning out like I’d played it over and over in my head. Though, as I’m not dead yet, well, I suppose it’s going well enough.
He shifts closer to me, his dress shoes scuffing the newly cleaned floor. “You knew this whole time?” he says, almost in a whisper, so quiet he might be talking to himself.
I gulp and watch him as if he’ll give me a hint to his feelings. I’ve never been able to read him the way he can read me.
When he drops to his knees where he stands, I jolt. His head bows into his hands, and all I can think about is comforting him. I slide off the bed and crawl toward him. The wood makes my joints ache, but I don’t care.
He takes me in his arms the second my fingers slide over his forearm. “Angel, you should never have had to go through this alone.”
I cup his cheeks between my palms and smile. “I’m not alone now.”
His hand slides down my arms to my hip and then back up to my stomach. He spreads one hand over my belly, the other trapping the back of my neck. “A baby. My baby.”
I nod, the sight of him going blurry through a new round of tears. My ears burn, and I try not to start blubbering all over again. “This is what I want. A family. With you. No more secrets between us, I promise.”
Reverently, he trails his hands up and wipes the wet from my cheeks. “No more secrets, Angel. On either side. If you ask me anything, I’ll tell you the truth, even if you don’t want to hear it.”
I nod and push up to rest my forehead against his. God, he feels so good, so right in my arms. I’m finally home. “We’ll get through this.” Somehow, as I say the words, I believe them.
He wraps his arms around me and holds me closer, our bodies locked together. “I hate that we were apart. And that you felt like you couldn’t tell me the truth.”
I gulp, not wanting to go near any reminders of what I did to him all those years ago, even if I hadn’t known. We aren’t in the home stretch yet. As much as he wants to trust me, I know it’s going to take time. If we force it, things will only get worse. I need to show him I’m not going to leave him again. That I’m staying, no matter what.
His next words break my heart all over again.
“I wish we could go back to the way things were.”
I delve my fingers into the hair at the nape of his neck, feeling the soft tendrils, memorizing how his muscles shift against me. There’s nothing to say to such a statement, and I don’t want to keep crying. So I remain silent, hoping he knows I wish the same thing.
I close my eyes and take another long inhale. If I could make this moment last forever, I would. Just holding him, the outside world can splinter and fall away. He’s the only thing I need.
“Angel,” he says again. This time, his voice holds a hint of smoke and ember. It takes only a second for my body to smolder under the heat of it.