“Mr. Steel,” the maître d’ says, “we’re honored to have you here.”
“My wife was Dennis’s daughter-in-law. We’re so sorry for the loss.”
“Thank you. He was a wonderful chef. Follow me, please.”
After we’re situated at our table and Dale has ordered a bottle of wine, I turn to Mom.
“You held up great today.”
She sighs. “I did my share of weeping.”
“That’s normal, Mom. He was your husband.”
“For less than a week.”
“That doesn’t mean you loved him any less. I swear, his family is a piece of work, huh?”
Mom nods. “They are, but I honestly don’t care one way or the other.”
“Did Dennis leave a will?”
She shakes her head.
“Then you’re his next of kin.”
“I suppose so.”
“Did you already consolidate your accounts?”
“No, not yet. We were going to take care of all that once we got back to LA.”
God, what a mess.
“I can have an estate attorney get in touch with you,” Dale says. “To help you sort it all out.”
Mom smiles. Sort of. “That would be kind of you, Dale. Thank you.”
“Our counsel will know someone in LA. I’ll take care of it first thing in the morning.”
Mom nods. “I hope his mother doesn’t try anything.”
“She can’t,” Dale says. “If Dennis died intestate, you’re his next of kin. It all goes to you.”
“I don’t even want it.”
“You’re entitled to it,” I say.
“He didn’t have a lot. His salary was good, but you know as well as I do, Ashley, that living here is expensive.”
“Did he own a home?” I ask.
She nods. “We were going to put it on the market. He wasn’t sure he’d have a job after the buyout of this place was complete, so we figured we’d sell and go RVing for a while. I was so looking forward to getting out of California and seeing the country.”
You can still do that. The words are on the tip of my tongue, but I hold them back. She can’t. She can’t travel the country alone in an RV. It’s not safe.
“The attorney will be able to find all his assets and get them through probate,” Dale says. “It takes some time.”
“All I have is time,” Mom says.
“Mom,” I say, determined to put her needs before my own, “I’m going to stay with you for a while. Help you get through this.”
“Don’t be silly, Ashley. You’re a newlywed. Your place is with Dale. I’m fine.”
“You’re not fine. You’ve hardly eaten in days.”
“I ate the burger you brought me.”
True, she did. Thank God. “Still…”
She shakes her head with conviction. “Absolutely not. Just because I was cheated out of my honeymoon doesn’t mean you should be.”
Huh. Honeymoon. I haven’t given a honeymoon a thought, and judging by the look of surprise on Dale’s face, neither has he.
“Don’t tell me you haven’t planned a honeymoon,” Mom says.
“Well…no. We’ve been a little busy,” I say.
“Harvest time,” Dale says absently. “And some of the wine is already fermenting.”
“Right. There’s no way Dale could leave the ranch for more than a day or two at a time. That’s why he’s going back tomorrow.”
“Right.” Mom nods.
But I wonder at Dale’s countenance. Does he even want a honeymoon?
What’s going on?
I make my final decision then. My mother’s a grown woman. Dale will get her an attorney to sort out Dennis’s estate.
And I’m going home.
Home with my husband.
I love him, and he loves me. I don’t question that.
But still…
I fear for our young marriage.
Chapter Forty-Three
Dale
I hold Ashley’s hand on the plane ride home. We’re seated alone in first class, and Ashley turns down the flight attendant’s offer of a drink.
So do I.
I don’t drink in the morning. In fact, I rarely drink before six p.m.
“Hey,” Ashley says. “Are we okay?”
Fuck, what a loaded question.
She’s fine. Ashley herself is more than fine. I, on the other hand, am a fucked-up mess.
I married this woman for the wrong reasons.
I stare down at her fingers interlaced with mine, the diamond-and-garnet ring sparkling in the overhead light. The bauble was made for her. For my Ashley.
God, what was I thinking?
Marrying her in Las Vegas? I’ve never been one to act on impulse, and that was pure impulse. No two ways about it. Now I have to break her heart as well as my own.
I should have held back. I should have never fallen in love.
Why? Why did I let my guard down?
Why did I open my heart?
Why did I allow emotion to rule me?
Emotion…
Emotion sucks.
Good or bad, it leads only to heartache.
I’ve been holding myself together.
But after that phone call from the fire marshal…
How much longer can I steel myself?
I did. For Ashley. To get her through this.
But it’s done now. Sure, her mother will grieve still. Ashley will grieve for her mother’s pain.
But it’s done. Over and done.
And I have to end things.
I have to tell Ashley our marriage was a mistake.
She’ll say I don’t love her.