“But—”
“Shh. I’ve been around depression. I told you my mother struggles as well. Don’t blame yourself for this. You have enough on your plate. You don’t deserve it.”
“I can’t help it.”
“Then blame me as well. I contributed to your condition as much as you did.”
“But we didn’t do it on purpose. You used a condom.”
I smiled and shoved a stray hair away from her eye. “That’s my point. It happened anyway. It was fate.”
“Fate,” she said softly.
Daphne had first used the word to describe our meeting, and I’d grown to believe her. Fate had a hand in it. A big hand. Any other time, a condom would have prevented pregnancy. We’d beaten the odds.
As far as I was concerned, this child was meant to be.
I kissed her forehead. “You’ve had a rough night. Go to sleep. I’ll find the guest room.”
“I’m not sure Mom put it together yet.”
“Doesn’t matter.”
“No. Stay with me.”
“I’d love nothing more, but this bed is tiny.”
“I’ll lie on top of you.”
“Then neither of us will get any sleep. Besides, if your father comes home early and finds me in bed with you—”
“I’m already pregnant, Brad. What else does he think could happen?”
She had a point, but I’d come to respect Jonathan Wade. He loved his daughter and would take care of her forever if he had to.
He didn’t have to.
It was my job now.
“It would be disrespectful for me to sleep in here with you, baby. You know that.”
“Yeah, I know,” she relented. “The guest room is right next to this one. I hope there are sheets on the bed.”
“If there aren’t, I’ll find something. Don’t worry about me.” I rolled off the bed and grabbed my clothes. “Come on. Get under the covers.”
“I should put some pajamas on.”
“Yeah, good idea. I’ll get them. Where are they?”
“Top drawer of my dresser.”
I opened the drawer and pulled out what appeared to be a nightgown. “This?”
“That’ll do.”
I gave it to her. Once her beautiful body was covered, I gently tucked her into bed. “Holler if you need anything. Try to get some sleep. Your mom is in good hands.”
She nodded and closed her eyes.
I walked out, flipping the light switch.
I found the guest room, and there were sheets on the bed. I put my underwear back on along with a T-shirt and slid under the covers.
“Brad.”
A low voice.
I jerked upward.
“It’s me. Jonathan.”
My eyes adjusted to the dark. Jonathan Wade stood in the guest room.
“Is everything okay? Lucy?”
“She’s going to be fine,” he said. “Come downstairs. We need to finish our talk.”
“What time is it?”
“Six a.m.”
I got out of bed. “No problem. I get up at five on the ranch.”
“I’ve already brewed a pot of coffee and checked on Daphne. She’s sleeping soundly.”
I pulled on my jeans and followed Jonathan downstairs to the kitchen. He’d already poured two cups of coffee.
“Black, right?”
I nodded.
“I thought that’s how you took it last night. I wasn’t sure, though. Seems like a lifetime has gone by since then.”
“Yeah, I know what you mean.” I swirled the coffee in my cup to cool it and then took a sip.
“I haven’t had a chance to talk at length with a doctor about Lucy.”
“Of course not. It was the middle of the night.”
“Yeah, and today is Sunday. I’ll make an appointment first thing tomorrow.”
I nodded. “What exactly happened? Daphne said they pumped her stomach.”
“Yeah. Just to get the drugs out of her, but most of it had gotten into her bloodstream by that time. Turns out it’s nearly impossible to die from overdosing on Valium. You’d have to take way more pills than Lucy had.”
“Thank God.”
“Still, she’s not out of the woods. She had a lot of alcohol in her system as well as some barbiturate sleeping pills. I don’t know what she was thinking.”
I didn’t know what to say to that, so I said nothing.
“Honestly, Brad, I had no idea she was suffering so much.”
“If it helps, I don’t think Daphne did either.”
“Daphne hasn’t been here for the last month. I have been. I should have seen the signs.”
“Not if they weren’t there.” I cleared my throat. “Daphne is blaming herself.”
Jonathan’s eyebrows shot up. “Why would she do that?”
“She thinks her pregnancy sent Lucy over the edge.”
“I hope you told her that’s not true.”
“I did. Whether she believes me is another story.”
Jonathan shook his head. “Daphne doesn’t need this. She has enough to deal with.”
I nodded. She did, even if she didn’t know part of what she was dealing with.
“I’ve been thinking,” Jonathan said. “Lucy had to be so strong after what happened to Daphne. She could never falter, never let our daughter see the pain she was carrying. Now, with Daphne gone, Lucy’s had time to dwell on things. In retrospect, I could see her declining. I should have been more attentive.”
“Hindsight is always twenty-twenty.” How well I knew. “Don’t blame yourself. You didn’t force those pills down her throat.” I winced at my own words. Had I gone too far?