Finding My Forever (Beaumont 3)

“I’m fat.”

I stop us from dancing and put my hands on her cheeks, forcing her to look at me. “You’re beautiful and sexy. So fucking sexy that I’ve got a hard-on just thinking about you. I’ve wanted you for so long before the wedding and when I finally had you, I needed more. I’d be here even if you weren’t pregnant. I don’t want to hear that you’re fat or not beautiful because you put all these other women to shame.”

I take her hand and lead her out of the room. I know this party is for us, but I’ve just got back and I need to be alone with my wife.

I roll over and look at my sleeping husband. He kept me up late last night saying goodbye and memorizing every inch of my body and as much as I’d like to be sleeping right alongside him, the baby is running a marathon inside me right now. I could wake him and ask him to sing to our child, but I like watching him sleep. It’s a glorious sight with the sheet barely covering him, and I like being able to stare at his body freely. If I wanted I could trace the lines of his abs perfectly with my fingers and watch him wake from my touch.

I hate admitting it, but he’s been the model husband since he came back from Los Angeles and I love having him here. He’s been attentive, caring and doesn’t leave my side unless it’s for band practice. He’s leaving today, after being home for a month. Not back to LA but to go on tour. When he told me, I freaked. My body shook. I cried and shut myself in our room for hours until he couldn’t take it anymore. It’s the stupid pregnancy hormones, I know it is. I let my mind get the best of me and believe that he’s going to return to the old Jimmy and that this past month was nothing but a show. I know my mind is being irrational. He’s not going to leave me for a groupie, but it’s hard. I want to live in a bubble and pretend the outside world doesn’t exist. The irrational side of me needs to shut the hell up and enjoy the man next to me. He says he’s not cheating and I need to trust that, trust him.

This tour will be different and the first one where the wives aren’t going. The thought never crossed my mind about going with them, but Josie and Katelyn usually travel with the band. They’re staying back for my benefit. I told them I’d be fine, but they wouldn’t listen. With my parents gone and my third trimester looming, they felt it better that they stay with me. I’ll be moving into Josie’s house today until the guys get back. Not something I wanted to do, but my husband asked and even batted his damn eyelashes at me. Who am I to refuse?

My fingers have a mind of their own and follow the image engraved in my mind as they trace the ridges on his stomach. He stirs and mumbles something, but I don’t stop. I try not to laugh, biting my bottom lip to keep from giggling. Side to side my finger moves lightly touching his skin. His skin pebbles from my touch, encouraging me to keep at it.

His hand stills mine. I look at his face for any sign of displeasure but see none. He slides my hand under the sheet and onto his hard on. He moves my hand up and down a few times before letting go. I watch as the sheet moves from the motion. I push it aside so I can take in the glory that is my husband. I glance at him, his eyes are shut and his arms are resting behind his head. I know he’s awake by the sexy smirk spreading across his face.

I lean down and lick the valley between his abs. My tongue traces through the light path of hair leading to where I want to be. My lips replace my tongue. His fingers thread through my hair. If I look up, I’ll be done for. His eyes do me in each and every time. I know what he wants and have no problems giving it to him.

“Come here and kiss me, wifey.”

I chuckle, but don’t move toward him. I straddle him as I kiss the top of his cock and replace my hand with my tongue. Jimmy hisses as his hips move forward. I chance a look and see his head thrown back. Seeing him like this spurs me to do this for him. If I can make him feel good, maybe he won’t leave me in the end. I take him fully in my mouth, my hands spread out over his abdomen, my nails scratching lightly as they move.

His hand cups my arm pulling me away. “I need a kiss,” he says as he brings me to his lips. In one swift move he impales me and sets a quick and fast rhythm. I scream out in pleasure as he rocks into me. “Christ, Sweet Lips, I fucking love your pussy.”

A moan escapes causing him to laugh.

“You like it when I talk dirty, don’t you?”

“Yes,” I say, breathlessly. He rolls us over and sits back on his haunches. His thumb presses against my clit. My eyes roll back as he continues to work my body into a frenzy. I’ve never felt like this. I’ve never felt like I’m standing on the edge and the only relief I’ll get is if I fall over the side. He does this to me. He brings this out of me. Jimmy’s masterful in the art of sex and I’m his student. He’s teaching me to listen to my body, to feel what pleasure he’s giving me. This is a class I want to flunk, repeatedly, so he has to start all over again.

I scream out as my orgasm rolls over me. Jimmy moves faster, more urgent. The pulsing is almost much too much to bear and I dig into

his skin looking for relief. He falls on top of me, panting.

“What am I to you?” he asks.

“My husband.”

“Damn straight. Now kiss me.”

“DO you think you have everything?” I ask, folding another shirt before putting it in his suitcase. We’ve stalled long enough, avoiding the inevitable. He’s leaving for months and the timing couldn’t be worse. They’ll be gone most of the summer, arriving home a few weeks before my due date. I’m nervous, I won’t lie, if the baby will come early and he won’t be here.

I want him to stay, but I don’t tell him this. I can’t. Touring is part of his job and as much as I’m going to hate it, he has to go. I know I won’t be alone, but I’ve grown rather fond of having Jimmy in my life every day. Waking up, walking to work and crawling into bed has become a treat for me.

“I’ve never taken this many things before. You’re spoiling me.” Jimmy kisses me on my cheek and slaps my ass. He’s sweet on one side, dirty on the other. Honestly, I wouldn’t change him.

“I want to make sure you have enough clothes.”

“You know we always use the facilities at the hotels we stay in and our manager will make sure our clothes get washed, right?” He playfully asks over his shoulder as he walks into the bathroom.

“What’s his name again?” I know Josie and Katelyn were beyond happy that another “Sam” wasn’t hired. I hid my elation that the new manager is a man. The last thing I want is some other woman doing Jimmy’s laundry. I’ve become quite fond of the boxers he wears.

Jimmy comes out of the bathroom shirtless. My folding falters as I watch him move around the room. “He’s called Gary. He’s from New York so not involved with the LA scene which is what Liam and Harrison wanted. He’s also married and has kids so he gets it.”

“Yeah, that’s good,” I say, my voice breaking. Jimmy comes up behind me, rests his chin on my shoulder and places his hands on my belly. His thumbs move up and down over my shirt.

“For the first time since I joined the band I don’t want to go,” he whispers against my neck.

I nod, agreeing with him because I don’t want him to go either. Or I wish I was going with him, but it’s just not possible. “Would you be mad if I said I wanted you to stay?”