Finding My Forever (Beaumont 3)

“I do wish I had met her under different circumstances, but I give my daughter-in-law all the credit in the world. You were her priority and she made sure you had the best care possible. But I do think bath time was her favourite.”

I smile and move my mask up. “Mine too.”

WE are leaving Chicago today after being here for six-weeks. Jimmy can’t walk without assistance yet and it’s driving him batty. Physically, he can walk, but his oxygen levels are still too low to maintain his normal habits. This also means no performing until he’s given the okay by his doctor.

I’m not even going to sugarcoat it — I’m ready to go back to Beaumont. I’m tired of hospital life. I’d like to say I’ll never be back, but Little One’s due date is fast approaching. I’m just thankful that Jimmy will be there to help bring her into the world because if he missed this, I don’t think he’d forgive himself.

Jimmy’s most recent set of x-rays show his lungs have healed, but there’s scar tissue that could be bothersome later in life. He has to work with a physical therapist three days a week until he’s cleared. Liam thought it was a good idea for the band to get into shape, so he hired a guy named Alexander Knight to see to the bands’ needs. He’ll be doing Jimmy’s training as well. Liam wants to keep it all in the family. If I didn’t know better I’d think that Liam is developing a mob mentality. Not that you’re going to hear me complain.

Katelyn and Josie have already dished on his deets. He’s single, goes by the nickname Xander and has the most delectable muscles. This is from Josie. It’s a good thing Liam has her wrapped around his finger because Xander might be his competition. Katelyn says his eyes are caramel colored and she might have a hard time focusing when he’s showing her how to tone her arms.

Damien is still on the loose. From what we’ve been told, his parents were under surveillance for a while and were even brought in for questioning. They admitted to knowing about the abuse, saying that he confided in them that he needed help, but they didn’t want to meddle. I don’t know if I should thank them for not meddling or bash their heads together for keeping their mouths shut.

I’m happy with my husband who is sleeping for the last time in his hospital bed. Tonight, he’ll be in the comforts of our new home, courtesy of Josie and Katelyn. Here’s what I learned. My husband is a sneaky little shit. While he was on tour, instead of resting or preparing for that night’s show he, along with my two best friends, were plotting behind my back to buy us a house. When we return to Beaumont I’ll be a suburban housewife complete with a porch swing and white picket fence. As much as I want to yell at him, I can’t. He did this for me and Little One and I’m grateful.

I’ve spent many hours watching Jimmy sleep. It’s funny, I never thought it would be an activity that I’m fond of, but I am. I think it’s the only time his mind shuts down and allows his body to rest because when he’s awake, he wants… no, he needs… to be a part of everything going on.

His dad will be here soon. I’m dreading this and so is Brigette. James had the audacity to ask for a “private” visit, which I vehemently denied. I don’t trust him and I definitely don’t want Chelsea in here alone with him. Jimmy is getting stronger by the day, but he’s not in a position to fend off unwanted attacks by a psycho ex-girlfriend or the verbal barrage his father plans to let loose.

Maybe Chelsea isn’t psycho and that’s an unfair assessment. From what I’ve learned they had a pretty solid relationship, until she screwed up. Maybe I should thank her because had she not, I wouldn’t be standing here today. And Jimmy wouldn’t be lying in a hospital bed with a machine hooked up to him making sure he’s getting enough oxygen. So I’m the bad seed. I brought this onto him. I put him there. Damn him and his intuitive mind knowing that the baby was his.

“What are you thinking about?” his voice is raspy, sexy. I want to hear him talk to me like this all day, but he can’t. Right now the most he can go is twenty minutes before the mask has to go on, and sooner if we’ve been making out like horny teenagers.

I shake my head and walk over to him. I don’t want him to know I’m second guessing us meeting. He doesn’t need to worry about the guilt that I’m carrying around with me. He’s in this bed because of me. His lungs are damaged because I didn’t leave when I wanted to. I let people convince me to stay when I knew how dangerous Damien was, albeit I never thought he’d try to kill someone.

My someone.

I lean down and kiss him.

“My lips are dry,” he says as I pull away.

I nod and reach into the bag of essentials I’ve placed next to his bed. There’s everything here that he needs. Lip balm, handiwipes, lotion and candy to suck on. I pull out the lip balm and hand it to him. I’m supposed to stop enabling him and let him do things for himself. What the doctor doesn’t understand is that I like doing these things for him. It’s intimate for us and we need that right now.

“You don’t want to do it for me?” he asks, taking the tube from my hand.

“I do, but you’re supposed to do it yourself.”

“Come here,” he demands. I lean forward so that I’m inches away from him. He smiles as he uncaps the lip balm. He places it on my lips, rubbing it back and forth on my bottom and top lip. He leans forward and kisses me hard. “There, now I’m all set.”

“Yes, you are.”

“Knock, knock.”

“You have company,” I say quietly enough for him to hear me. He closes his eyes and nods.

“I love you.”

I lean forward and kiss him again before turning and pasting on a welcoming face. I hear Jimmy adjust his bed so he’s sitting up a bit more.

“Come on in.” I sit down next to Jimmy. Mean, I know, but I don’t want James and Chelsea to take up both sides of him.

“You’re staying?” James asks in a snide tone.

“She’s my wife. You better start accepting it.”

“No need to get angry, son. I was just asking a question. Chelsea and I thought we could spend some time with you.”

“Well, you can do it with Jenna here. Anything that you need to say can be said in front of her. I’m not exactly in a position to be able to repeat myself.”