Lost in You (Lost in You 1)

CHAPTER 36

Hadley

I barely make it off stage before Ian is dragging me down the hallway to my dressing room. He throws open the door and pushes me in. I stagger before catching myself. Alex and Cole are right behind us. Cole shuts the door and locks it.

“What the fuck was that?” Ian spits out.

I turn away and try to collect my thoughts. I pick up a rubber band off my vanity and pull my hair back. Ian spins me around to face him. “We had a deal, Hadley.”

“One bad show isn’t breaking any deals, Ian. I’m allowed to have a bad show.”

“No, you’re not,” he roars. “Those people don’t wait in line in the freezing cold and spend their hard-earned money so you can have a bad show. They expect nothing but the best when you step out there. We’ve talked about your image, Hadley, and this little stunt will cost you dearly. It won’t matter if you and Cole announce your engagement, the media is going to have a field day once all the blog posts go up.”

Ian grabs his head as he screams out in frustration. “I don’t get you. I really don’t understand how you can perform night after night and get up on stage now and forget your words. These are songs you know in your sleep. You don’t forget them. When you’re up on that stage, nothing else matters, but you…” He stalks over to me, his finger pointing at my face. His teeth are clenched and his normally coifed hair is standing on end. “You just keep screwing up and expecting me to fix it and I’m sick of it.”

“Ian, that’s enough.” I expect to hear Alex’s voice, but it’s Cole. He pushes Ian’s finger away from my face and stands in front of me. “She had a bad night; if anyone knew what was going on, they’d forgive her. We should never have come here.”

Ian rips his hand out of Cole’s and starts pacing. I’m just one giant screw-up after another. It doesn’t matter what I do. Everything ends up in shambles. I lean my forehead on Cole’s back and wrap my arms around his waist. Right now he’s my safety net.

“You have to make this show up to them.”

“Why?” Cole asks. “This is her second show here in months. Somehow I’m thinking you planned this because everything has been going so well you needed as excuse to railroad her again. You hate that we aren’t front-page news anymore now that everyone thinks we’re back together, so you’re creating some drama. Jesus, Ian, let her be human for one moment. She made a mistake, let it go. It was a bad night, it’s over, time to move on.”

“Cole’s right,” Alex adds. “I can’t help but think you set her up for failure with this show. You know what happened here last time.”

“What do you know, you’re just a clinger.”

“Excuse me,” I say, coming around Cole. He sets his hand down in front of me, halting my movements. “You can’t talk to Alex like that, she’s my best friend. Aside from Cole, she’s the only one who knows how I’m feeling.”

“Unbelievable,” he mutters as he storms out of the room. We’re all quiet, waiting for him to start yelling at the road crew or some indication that he’s still lingering, but we hear nothing. Cole pulls me into his arms as I break down. He scoops me up and carries me over to the couch, setting me down gently.

“I’m going to go so she can change,” he says to Alex. She quickly wraps her arms around me, much like earlier tonight, as I sob. I’m such an idiot for thinking I’m strong enough to handle being away from Ryan. I should’ve listened to my heart and not my head, because clearly my head is so far in the clouds that nothing makes sense.

Alex helps me change into my sweats before the crew comes in to pack up my things. We are due in another city tomorrow and have a long night ahead of us. Alex packs my essentials for me while I gather my purse. We walk arm in arm out of the dressing room and down the long hall to the bus. When we pass Cole’s dressing room, it’s empty. He’s likely already asleep on the bus. Lucky him.

We step outside and the flashbulbs are instant. People yell my name and grab at my clothes, startling me. The media isn’t supposed to be back here and I can’t help but think Ian set this up because of what Cole said to him.

Questions are flying at me right and left about Cole, which I’ve learned to ignore, but when one says Ryan’s name, I freeze. Cameras go off, the constant clicking sound of the shutter irritating me.

“Who’s Ryan Stone?” a reporter asks. I’m dumbfounded, unable to move. I feel Alex pushing me, her other arm blocking my line of sight, but I don’t move. He told them. Ian told the reporters his name. Something he promised he’d never do. Ryan’s name is repeated over and over again as if my silence is answering all their questions. It won’t matter what I say from here on out, they will hunt him down like vultures until they find out who he is.

I’m lifted off the ground and carried onto the bus. I bury my face into Cole’s neck as he mutters death threats and Ian’s name. He carries me to our room, the room we’ve been sharing on the bus under the pretense that we’re a couple because Ian says you can never trust y

our own crew. He lays me down and slides in behind me.

Alex walks in and hands him something. “Here, get her to take this; it will help her sleep and maybe forget.”

“Somehow I doubt that,” he says.

The door clicks quietly. I sigh and wonder where the tears are. How come I’m not crying?

“Can you sit up?” he asks as he adjusts behind me.

“I’ll be okay.”

“I have no doubt, but you need some sleep and your mind will race all night and I need sleep, too, so your tossing and turning will just piss me off.”

“You’re so kind,” I say as I sit up and take the pill and glass of water from him. He smiles as he downs the rest of my water. Jerk. He leans over and kisses me on the forehead. He lingers there for a moment before pulling away. I know he wants more, but I can’t. Not with him.