I lean forward as far as I can to make eye contact with her. “But is she good with you? I don’t want things at the house to be awkward,” I tell her as I lean back and pull her to my chest. “You need to be comfortable in your home and if she makes you uncomfortable, I’ll ask her to leave. I’m sure she has friends down here, or she can stay with Carter and Lois.”
Ryley nods and her hands hang from my arms. “Lois would love that. Grace loves Livvie.”
“Who’s Grace?”
She chuckles lightly. “Grace is EJ’s future wife.” I tickle her sides when she says that and continue to do so even as she attempts to move away from me.
“You know he may be a boy, but no woman will ever be good enough for him,” I say once I let go. Ryley crawls back into her spot and faces me.
“I feel the same way and I know your mom does as well. Thing is, when you fall in love, it’s because of who you’re meant to be with, not who your parents choose for you.” Her hand caresses my face and I fight every urge to lean in and steal a kiss. “Grace is Carter and Lois’s daughter. She’s just a few months younger than EJ.”
Taking her hand from my cheek, I kiss her palm. “You and Lois were pregnant together.” I say matter-of-factly. “When we were in high school I remember Carter coming over one day all freaked out because Lois thought she was pregnant and all I could think about was what it would be like to see you holding our child. I was eighteen and having thoughts about us having a family. That day in the park, when I hit you – which I’m thinking wasn’t an accident at all but actually kismet – I knew then that you were meant for me, Ry.”
With the strict no kissing in front of EJ policy in place, she wraps her arms around me. I want to lay her down and hold her, but won’t compromise her like that in front of EJ. There’s so much I want to do to her, but can’t. My hands are furtively tied behind my back where she’s concerned and I know I’m going to lose my shit if I see Nate touch her.
She pulls away, resuming her spot between my legs. She brings my arms around her, encasing her. “We need to talk about what happens when Nate comes back.”
There’s a low growl building when she brings up his name and pending return. I’m not looking forward to seeing him act as if he’s me. He’s taken my girl, my son, my dog and my house and if he thinks that I’m just going to walk away gracefully, he’s got another think coming. Ryley is the only one who can tell me to leave and I don’t think she will.
“I’m not going to pretend I know what I’m doing, but EJ can’t get hurt. Nate is going to come home soon, and whether you like it or not, he thinks of that house as his home. When he does… when you see him, you can’t hurt him. You can’t fight, not in front of EJ.”
“I want to kill him, Ry.”
She turns, facing me with tears in her eyes. Again, her hand caresses my cheek. “You won’t because your son loves him.”
I look at EJ, so innocent and unaware of the truth, a truth that he needs to know. If Ryley and Nate think I’m going to stand by and let this charade continue, they’re sorely mistaken. Children are resilient. That’s something I learned from the mission we were on. Each child we saved gave us hope even though they had none themselves.
Ryley brings my face back to hers. “Are you hearing me?”
“I want my family back, Ryley.” I leave her with that thought, and go back over to EJ as I had promised earlier. I start helping him build his sand castle, working together as father and son.
COMING HOME TO AN empty house is not my idea of happiness. I’ve been counting the hours until I could return home... until I could hold Ryley and play ball with EJ in the backyard. At this point, mowing the lawn is better than where I’ve been. I’m just happy to be home.
The house has an eerie feel, almost somber. It’s too quiet for my liking. I turn on the TV to create some background noise. The luggage in the corner catches my eye and I rifle through it. I’m nosey. It’s my nature. It’s full of women’s clothing but nothing Ryley would wear. Maybe Carter and Lois had a fight while I was gone and she’s been staying here. I doubt it, but it’s better than thinking Ryley has suddenly taken on a transient.
I walk into the kitchen and pull a beer out of the fridge. I should call Ryley and tell her I’m home, but I think surprising her would be best. I love seeing the look on her face when I come home. The way she feels pressed against my body after I’ve been gone. I’ve missed her terribly and need to hold her.
Sitting down on the couch, I pick up the pad of paper on the coffee table, hoping to find a note as to where she might be. It’s just her doodles, the silly little drawings that she used to do back in high school.
She draws swirly designs all over her no
tepad. I don’t know why girls do this. Is it so they don’t have to make eye contact with us? If so, that’s the stupidest reason ever. She didn’t even move when I sat down. I saw her in the hall earlier and almost lost my shit. Evan is going to freak out when he finds out. I send him a quick text, letting him know that the angel that saved him from purgatory is sitting next to me in class. I sort of want to ask her to look at me so I can razz him later about the shiner he gave her. I’ve never seen him so pussy whipped by a girl he doesn’t even know.
I wish I could remember her name. If I did, I could introduce myself again. I wasn’t paying attention yesterday because I thought she was just another piece of ass for Evan. But he acted differently around her at the park, and I’ve never seen him stare at the phone for so long. That’s where I found him this morning – asleep with his head on top of the phone. He had a nice indent when he woke up.
She peers at me, and I smile. She probably thinks I’m creepy. I probably am creepy. Her head pops up and now she’s full on staring. I close my mouth, afraid that I have something in my teeth. Evan has been making me drink those damn protein shakes in the morning to bulk up, but I know I brushed my teeth. There can’t be any residue left, right?
“You look just like your brother,” she blurts out and I’m rewarded with the most glorious shade of red as she blushes. Her beautiful hair -- the color of red autumn leaves -- tries to hide her face, and I’m tempted to reach out and push it behind her ear.
Wait, what?
This is Evan’s girl.
I can’t touch her.
But I want to.
I laugh, and it’s awkward. She turns to face me again and her eyes pierce mine. She thinks I’m laughing at her. I’m not. I’m laughing at my idiotic heart that is falling for a girl my brother desperately wants. Oh, the irony.