“I am happy. Just because I don’t smile as much as Daniel doesn’t mean—”
“I think you might be happy, but you can’t possibly know. For instance... Do you really like antiques? Or did you open an antique shop because your dad likes to restore antiques?”
“I love antiques... and woodworking.” Even as he spoke the words, a niggling doubt entered his mind.
“Adam, I never said anything when you were dating Darla, but... were you actually in love with her?”
“Of course I was. How can you ask that?”
“I’m asking because she asked me.”
“What? She knew I loved her. I told her all the time. I bought a ranch for her. We planned our family together, for heaven’s sake! What did Darla say to you?”
His mother’s lips turned down, and she reached out her hand, as if to soften the blow that was coming. “Only that she thought you were in love with the idea of being married to her instead of being in love with her. You were always talking about having a family with her and how great it would be to raise your kids in Romance.”
“We were getting married. Of course I wanted to have kids with her.” Adam felt like screaming. He’d done everything to please Darla, but nothing seemed to work.
“Yes, but you had a box in your mind, and you wanted to fit her into it—as your wife and the mother of your children.”
“I thought she wanted to be my wife and the mother of my children.” He let out a bitter laugh. “But then I found out she didn’t love me at all.”
“No, Sweetheart, Darla loved you.” She shook her head, her mouth pressed into something between a grimace and a forced smile. “She loved you too much to saddle you with a loveless marriage.”
“I don’t get it, Mom. What are you trying to say?”
“Just that Darla loved you with all her heart and wanted you to love her the same way. But she couldn’t compete with all your lofty life goals. And honestly, Adam, neither can you.”
“You’re not making any sense. What do you expect me to do? Track Darla down in Portland and try again?”
“Adam... Darla’s engaged. She’s getting married in a few weeks.”
“Oh.” He waited to feel the hurt and jealousy that ought to follow her announcement, but nothing came. “I’m happy for her.”
“I am, too. She deserves to love and be loved, and so do you.”
The light dawned. “So you’re telling me I should date Ash? Is that what this is about?”
“Goodness, no! That would be more of the same. More of you trying to do the right thing—the perfect thing. More of you trying to love the right person that you chose by ticking off a list of qualifications. I don’t want you to date Ash—I want you to stop judging her. She can’t live up to your perfectionist standards any more than Darla could. No one could.” She cocked her head to the side and narrowed her eyes. “I know the two of you got off on the wrong foot, but I want you to be nice to her. Treat her like family.”
“Like family?”
“Yes, like family.” She paused, chewing on her lower lip. “Something tells me Ash could really use a family right now.”
Chapter Five
HOW ASH WISHED SHE’D left her purse in the car so she could escape without returning inside. What must they think of her, acting so strangely? She certainly couldn’t tell them about her true identity now.
Glad she’d fought her penchant for height-boosting heels, opting for jeans and comfy flats, she scurried down the driveway, anxious to put some distance between her and a humiliating situation. At least it wasn’t dark yet, though heavy clouds hid the setting sun. She decided a short walk down the deserted country lane would give her time to formulate a story. Besides, the air smelled good here compared to New York City, a wonder she hoped never to take for granted.
Perhaps she could use elements of the truth to justify her reaction without lying or revealing the violence in her past. She tried to formulate a reasonable explanation.
What if she claimed she thought she’d seen a wasp? It was a pretty good excuse. But it was also an out-and-out lie. She would never be able to pull it off with a straight face.
Could she blame it on a hot flash? Honestly, she had felt a little warm while sitting at the table, but weren’t hot flashes an old lady thing?
Though threatening dark clouds loomed in the sky, she continued to walk, glancing over her shoulder. As the wind picked up, she shivered, having also left her jacket in the house, but she was more concerned about making a poor impression on her newly-discovered family than a few chill bumps. What could she say when they questioned her?
She could say she’d watched too many R-rated movies. That seemed to be a fairly plausible explanation and could technically be true.