‘Will you light a candle for your safe return home?’ he asked, setting down his plate next to hers and seating himself on the broad stone well-top.
‘I expect so, although my aunt will probably regard it as superstition.’
‘Safe return home to where, though?’
Wherever you are. The words were so vivid in her mind that for one awful moment she thought she had spoken them aloud. Chance was staring at her—had she said something?
Chapter Fourteen
‘Now what have
I said to put you out of countenance?’ Chance asked. Alessa was staring at him, colour visible under the light gold of her tan.
‘Nothing! I mean, you have made me think about returning to England, and I truly do not know if it is for the best. Corfu has been home for so long. What if I do not like England? What if my family does not like me? And then there are the children to consider. Part of me thinks this is the best way to give them opportunities, and part of me thinks I am wrenching them away from everything they know.’
‘Children are adaptable,’ Chance said bracingly. ‘And it is up to you to make the decisions, not for them to dictate to you, their guardian. And you will soon settle with your family.’
‘I do not know whether I would want to live with them permanently.’ She was looking dubious.
‘But of course you must—unmarried ladies do not live independently.’
‘I am not a conventional unmarried lady, am I?’ She sent him a sideways look and he wondered if she was testing to see just how far she could go.
‘No, you are not, and to be comfortable in England I would suggest you become as conventional as possible, as soon as possible. Surely you want to make your come-out in society?’
‘And find myself a nice conventional husband? Hmm.’ She wrinkled her nose endearingly.
No, that was not what he wanted for her. He wanted her to fall in love with him and remain, in private at least, his very unconventional Alessa. But how could he say any of that, here in a monastery garden, surrounded by other people?
‘Would one want me, though? My past is dubious, after all.’ She did not seem to expect an answer to her own question, for she changed the subject abruptly. ‘Tell me, what degree of comfort might I expect for one thousand pounds a year?’ Alessa took a bite of bread and cheese and chewed thoughtfully for a minute. ‘My aunt says I have about that much, and a little manor in the country. It sounds a great deal of money.’
‘A respectable competence,’ Chance agreed. ‘Not a fortune, but you can maintain a small staff and dress well. You could keep your own modest carriage as well.’
‘And a good school for Demetri? And a governess for Dora?’
‘Why, yes, if you feel it best for them.’
‘I do.’ Chance found she was regarding him severely over the rim of her glass. ‘Please do not suggest to my aunt that there is any other solution, because if they cannot come with me, I am not going.’
‘Really, I have nothing to say in the matter,’ Chance protested.
‘Oh, yes, you have, if you choose. Status is very important to her, and I think she feels sometimes that she has married beneath her. She defers to your opinion, and to Lady Trevick’s—have you not noticed?’
‘I would expect her to defer to male opinion,’ Chance began.
‘Why? Now you are being stuffy again, just as you were on the terrace the other day, and I do not want to argue with you again.’
‘Stuffy? That was not what you said at the time, if I recall.’
‘Arrogant, then, if you must have it.’ Alessa scowled at him and Chance realised he was scowling back. Then suddenly her expression lightened and she smiled. Something inside him stammered and he realised it was his heart. ‘Oh, no, we must not quarrel. I will say sorry if you will.’ Chance found he could not resist the sparkle in her eyes. Then she looked away hastily and he was stricken with the fear that the sparkle had been tears, not humour. When she turned back, she was blinking a little in the sunlight.
‘Of course. I am sorry if I was—’ her brows drew together ‘—am arrogant. And I am sorry for what happened in the bay.’
‘And I am sorry I jumped to conclusions about your motives and because I was just as much to blame as you for what happened in the bay, and at the villa, and I should not have been cross about it.’
‘I take full responsibility for that,’ he protested, determined to do this apology properly.
‘Now that is arrogant.’A chill had come over her. Why? A moment ago he thought they could be friends again. ‘I am not a sheltered little miss like my cousin,’ she observed. ‘Men take these things less seriously than women.’ Alessa popped an olive between her lips and bit into it slowly with even white teeth.