I hunched my shoulders as I leaned forward. “Can we get to the point soon? I have to pick up Dani from school.”
She held her hand up. “Regardless, Steven and I began dating. And it was wonderful for awhile. He is very interested in starting a family.”
My gut started churning again. “You wanted to increase visitation because of a guy?”
“He made me wonder if I was missing something more.”
Of course she was missing something. The fact that Jessica treated Dani like a pretty doll she could take down when she was in the mood to play with her had always frustrated me. But she had never seen motherhood the way she should have.
Some of it might have stemmed from how her own mother had treated her. Jessica had been a pageant kid and had graduated to television as a teen. Pretty, shiny things had always been her main focus. Not to say she wasn’t a decent person under the gloss, just a very self-involved one as of late.
I swallowed. “And are you?”
“I’m not built to play house, John. You know that more than anyone.”
“No, staying at home always made you crazy.” I lifted my chin. I wouldn’t sugarcoat it. Not now. Now it was about what was best for our daughter. That was me.
And Macy.
Jessica laughed, but it sounded a little sad. “Sometimes I wish I was built for that. That it could be enough for me. Because I see the way Danielle talks about you. There’s a light there that I wish was there for me.” She folded her hands together to mirror mine. “But there’s not.”
“She loves spending time with you.”
“Yes, I know. I make sure of that, don’t I?”
I looked down at the chipped Formica tabletop.
“I’m well aware I’m more the fun aunt than her mom in her eyes.”
I opened my mouth to refute it, but the truth was so stark and cutting, I couldn’t.
She reached across the table to cover my hands. “I’m not taking her away from you, John. The more time I spent with Steven and the way he talked about us becoming a family, the more I railed against it. I barely knew him and he had this crazy fantasy about who he thought I should be.”
“Macy loves her so much. I didn’t mean for it to happen, but I’m not sorry. Watching them together makes me—” I cut myself off. I didn’t need to be cruel.
“Wish I’d been the same?”
I lifted my gaze to her. “No.”
She slipped her hand away and slid it back to her side of the table.
“I’m sorry, Jess. We barely worked for the short time we were together. Macy’s the woman I’ve been looking for all my life.”
Her eyes shimmered and she gave a half-laugh. “Well, that’s that, isn’t it?”
“I’m sorry.”
She shook her head. “The best part of you was always your clear and linear thinking. I used to envy it because I’m so not that woman. The only clear path I’ve ever had was to a soundstage. For Jessica Kyle to be a household name. And I might have the chance to do that.”
I leaned back in my seat. “And what does that mean for me and Dani?”
She lifted one long, ringed finger with a dagger of a nail. Jesus, that was a weapon. “I don’t like this Macy person.”
I had to look down and press my lips together. “That could be a problem. I’m going to marry her.”
Date her.
Date her.