“Whose dick is pressed against whose ass?” Alex asked, effectively breaking the tension.
“It’s morning wood!” I said again. “I’m sure you’re in the same situation.” My fingers twitched because…um…did I want to feel and see if I was right?
As if he’d electrocuted me, I jerked and rolled away.
Alex sighed. “On that note, I’m going to the bathroom.”
“Alex,” I said as he got out of bed. He was annoyed. I could see it, and I’d heard it in the sharpness of his voice. “Alex,” I called out again.
He turned before going into the bathroom. “I have to piss, Caden. It’s not a big deal.”
But it was. I’d hurt his feelings by pulling away from him, and that wasn’t something I ever wanted to do. I hated feeling like I let him down in any way.
Why is that? Why is Alex so special to me? Why has he always been?
A snippet of conversation came back to me, Dad saying, “You’re not… The two of you aren’t… You’re not messing around with Alex, are you?” The disappointment was clear in his tone.
“What? No, Dad! It’s not like that with us.”
I rolled to my back, rubbed the heels of my hands against my eyes, as if I could wipe away the memories—how Dad had looked at me when Alex had officially come out; the questions he always had about why we were so close, and my own confusion about my feelings for him; the way Dad stressed he had no problem with Alex, just didn’t want me to be that way with him, or any guy, for that matter.
I straightened my arm, looked at the band on my finger. I was married. To Alex. My Alex. I smiled. Why the fuck I was smiling, I didn’t know, but I couldn’t stop myself. My mouth suddenly had a mind of its own, and the bastard was stubborn, because no matter how many times I tried to frown or relax, it didn’t work.
“What are you doing? Why are you making weird faces while looking at your ring? You’re freaking me out here.”
Shit. I hadn’t heard him come out. “I don’t know,” I answered honestly.
His forehead wrinkled. “Did you take something?”
“Yes, Alex, because I take drugs often.” That wasn’t our scene.
“It was seriously creepy. You were going back and forth between smiling like The Joker, frowning, and trying to mean-mug your wedding ring.”
I ignored that and said, “You’re already not mad at me anymore. You can never stay upset with me for long.”
“I wasn’t mad at you, and stop bragging.”
I got up on my knees and walked that way to the edge of the bed. “Hey.” I put my hands on his waist. “I didn’t mean anything by it.” He was shirtless, and I found myself stroking his warm skin with my thumbs. It felt…good. Felt right.
“I know. And you’re smiling again.”
“I know. I’m happy.” I was so fucking happy—that he hadn’t married Jackass, that he’d taken me with him to Puerto Vallarta; that he was my best friend and put up with my shit; that he said I’d never lose him.
Alex cocked his head slightly, his mossy-green eyes dark and seeking. “Why?”
“Because I’m with you.” I was always happy when I was with him, but even more so now that he hadn’t married Jackass…but he’d married me. Yeah, he was drunk, which took some of the wind out of my sails, but still.
“You’re being weird.”
“I’m always weird.”
“This is different, though.”
It was. I didn’t know exactly what it meant, but I was going with it. “Come on. Let’s go have breakfast and then start our day. I want to have fun with you.”
Alex nodded but didn’t speak. He just looked at me, his stare as intense and confused as the twisting emotions inside me.
When he stepped backward, causing my hands to fall from his hips, I wanted him back. Just wanted to…touch him, to remind myself he was there and always would be.
Clearly, I was all up in my feels for some reason.
We got ready for the day, then went down to the restaurant for breakfast. When Alex’s coffee was empty, I asked our waiter, “Excuse me. Can my husband get a refill?” prompting Alex to roll his eyes at me, but a small smile curled the corners of his lips. It was obvious he was trying to hold it back, and I loved how easily I could make him grin and laugh. They were some of my favorite things to do.
We hung out by the pool for a while, did some swimming and just relaxed in the sun, and Alex made a zip-lining appointment for us later in the week.
That afternoon, Alex and Jackass had an ATV tour scheduled, so as his actual husband—temporary or not—I took his spot. We started at the beach, then took back roads to see spots of Puerto Vallarta I never would have known were there. They took us to a farm where they had tequila tasting. After our wedding night, neither of us was real excited about the idea of much alcohol, but we tasted a couple before we were led through the jungle. It was one of the coolest things I’d ever done, and that was all before we stopped for mountain views.