“I think I’m dead,” Caden said.
I couldn’t help smiling…and kissing him, everywhere. I didn’t want to stop, not while I was allowed free rein, so I didn’t, kissing his lips, his cheeks, his neck, his chest, his stomach. When I got our come on my lips, I licked it off.
“Holy shit, that was hot too,” he said, so I did it again, lapped it all up. I loved eating his load with mine, knowing it was a gift we’d given each other.
I took my underwear all the way off, then his, and lay beside him. “Are you okay?” I had to ask.
“Yeah, part of me is freaking out a bit, while another part is wondering why it took us so long to do this. Most of me knows we were always going to end up here.”
I tried not to hope, not to show him how much I wanted that. “Yeah?”
He rolled his eyes. “Like you didn’t know.”
“I didn’t. I hoped, but I didn’t. You’re straight, Caden.”
“I’m clearly not very straight. I’m naked in bed with you after we got off together. You’re my husband, even if we were drunk when we did it. I almost went ballistic when that guy was dancing with you. I have to be…something other than straight. I guess a person can probably be bi and mostly lean one direction…”
“No, actually. When I got my gay card, they made us read every separate handbook. Bisexuality has very specific rules in place. It has to be a perfect fifty-fifty split, or they don’t let you in.”
He laughed. “Fuck off.”
Getting serious, I said, “You have to figure that out for yourself. No one else can or should do that for you. No one knows how you feel, or who you are, better than you.”
He nodded, paused a moment, then said, “So do I need to apply for membership to the bisexual club?”
“Tonight was your audition. You passed!”
“Sweet!” He kissed me. “How do I go about getting my card?”
“Queer people are magic, baby. We just know. It’ll arrive via unicorn in ten business days.”
Caden laughed again, then pressed his lips to mine, kissing me.
It was…everything. I didn’t know what all this meant, where we went from here, but now that I’d had a taste of him, I didn’t know how I’d ever survive without it.
Chapter Eight
Caden
I was in bed, naked, with Alex.
I’d slept in bed, naked, with Alex, after kissing him and touching him and coming with him.
Card or not, I was totally part-bi…or full-bi…? In any case, it wasn’t as if I’d never noticed some guys at least a little bit, including the asshole who tried to steal my husband last night. We’d talked about it more before going to bed, and Alex explained how bisexuality was a spectrum. And now I was on it.
I wondered if all this should be weirder for me than it was. I’d fucked around with a man for the first time last night, but I couldn’t find it in me to stress about it. I still didn’t know what this meant for us. I wanted him. I’d probably always wanted him. But it was one thing to jump into bed with him on our honeymoon in Puerto Vallarta, and a whole different situation when we went home.
When I had to tell my family. When I was suddenly with a man, and it would be something I’d have to tell everyone I knew or people I met…which was shitty…and something Alex still had to do. It was assumed everyone was straight. The world was still screwed up enough that it went that way. We’d talked about it after he’d come out publicly, how this was a thing he would always have to do, for the rest of his life.
If we stayed together, I would to.
I didn’t care, not if it meant having Alex, but it was still…different for me.
I looked down at my husband. We’d cuddled most of the night. He was lying on his stomach now, his far leg bent, his knee pointing toward the edge of the bed. He had the blanket up to his waist, but that same leg was poking out.
I took the time to study him, to study a person I knew as well as I knew myself. I brushed my fingers along his stubble, then across his back and down his spine, before peppering kisses to the freckles along his shoulders. Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine. I wanted Alex all to myself.
“Mmm. That feels good,” he said in a sleepy, hoarse voice, without looking at me.
I kissed him more, all over his back, before running my fingers tentatively along the edge of the blanket. When he nodded, I pushed it down, danced my fingers over his ass, then bent over and kissed one cheek.
“Remember when we were sixteen and I teased you about your ugly, hairy ass?”