He chuckles. “I hope it’s okay to ask, but … I thought you were bi?”
“I am. Total equal opportunist. I know some bi people have a preference, but my sexuality is strongly classified as hot for everyone.”
“So … the sugar daddy for men thing?”
“Mostly exaggerating.” I wonder if I should mention this next part, but hey, might as well. I’ve literally had his dick in my mouth; no point getting all coy now. “Now I’ve finished college, I literally have two goals in life. The first, snag this full-time position, and the second … find a guy to fuck me.”
It’s lucky Rossi has already swallowed his bite of sandwich, or he probably would have choked. “So, uh, that’s what you’re into?”
“Well, I don’t know yet. I’ve never tried it.”
His face is rapidly turning red. Just when I thought he couldn’t get any more adorable. “I can’t believe I’m having this conversation, but there are toys, right? You could try that way.”
“Oh, I have. Which has made me more determined. But there’s a big difference between a hunk of silicone and a hunk of, well, hunk.” I’m all about trying new things, and even without having bottomed before, I’m sure I’m going to love it. I once asked a girl I was seeing if she’d try pegging me, and the look on her face would have been priceless if it wasn’t so sad. I guess not everyone can be as sexually curious as me.
“If you’re that determined, you could try an app?”
“I’ve done apps before to meet people when I’ve been desperate, but I don’t really like them. I had a bad experience once and haven’t been back.” Then again, if it gets to the end of summer and I’m still a butt-virgin, I might need to go that option again.
“Bad experience?”
His concern is adorable, and I pat his thigh. “Nothing terrible. Just a guy who wanted to treat me like a whore. And sure, I’m a bit of a slut, but that doesn’t mean I want to be treated like one. When I tried to leave, he got shitty about it. No harm done.” I hadn’t known that at the time though. He was a total rando and could have been violent for all I knew. I didn’t like feeling unsafe, so I haven’t put myself back in that position.
He turns back to his sandwich while I finish off last night’s leftovers. If I’m smart, I can usually cook a dinner that will last two days. Penny-pinching for the win.
“Is that why you asked me?” His lips twitch a little as he meets my eyes.
“To fuck me?”
“Yeah.” His smile gets wider.
“Obviously, but don’t get too big of a head about it. I’m not picky.” Though when it comes to Rossi, I’d do about anything to have him be that guy for me. He seems sweet, and I’m so attracted to him I can’t spend five minutes in his presence without chubbing up. I want to bring up the straight thing, to ask if his curiosity was solved that night or if he still thinks about me on my knees, but the last thing I want is for him to think that’s all I’m after. We have to work together, and having a friend at the office wouldn’t be completely terrible either.
Rossi leans forward to set his trash down on the floor beside him before angling his body toward me. He props his elbow on the back of the couch and watches me. “Just how awkward do you think things would have been if we’d actually done that?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, a blowjob is one thing …”
I shrug. “It’s still sex.”
“Is it?”
“Yes.” I stop myself from getting into a rant about heteronormative standards on sex. “We had sex. Penetrative or otherwise, it all counts.”
“Right.” He glances away. “Guess I should have been even more nervous to see you, then.”
“Aw, little ol’ me.” I bat my eyelashes at him and turn so I’m facing him as well. “In all seriousness, why though? Why should we be nervous or embarrassed about what we did?”
“Well, because …”
“I’m your big gay secret?”
That gets his attention back on me. Right where I want it. He relaxes a little as he shakes his head. “Nah, that’s not what I’m nervous about.”
“Then what is it?”
He shifts a little closer and lowers his voice. “I think I’m nervous because it’s you.”
My smile is uncontrollable. “You wanna talk about that some more?”
“What’s to talk about?”
“How a poor bi boy like me could make a big bad hockey player like you nervous.”
“I’m not big, or bad, or a hockey player anymore.”
“Oh no, you’re definitely one of those things.” And his sweet ass doesn’t play hockey anymore.
“You’re kinda fun, you know that?”
“Oh, I know. I’m offended it took you until now to realize it.”