I swallow, refusing to answer.
His tone hardens and he nudges under my chin with the gun. “I’m fucking talking to you.”
“No,” I blurt, meeting his gaze. “I don’t know why.”
Lifting his eyebrows, he says, “Because I’m the asshole with the gun. Now, if you play by my rules, nobody has to get to hurt. Here’s what’s gonna happen. You wanna hear?”
I nod.
“You’re gonna do whatever I tell you to do, and you’re gonna do it nicely. You’re gonna do it with enthusiasm. You’re going to convince me you want it—even though you don’t.”
My pulse quickens and I meet his gaze, a sudden feeling of understanding sweeping over me. I know what he’s here for now, and while so much of me would love to give it to him, Rafe’s shadowy threats ring in my ears every time I even fantasize about doing anything naughty with Sin. “Sin, I want to, but I can’t. We can’t—”
He grabs a fistful of my hair and shoves my head down, pressing the barrel of his gun against my forehead as I cry out. “It’s time for you to listen, Laurel. No talking. I know how fucking hard it is for you to keep your mouth shut, but just give me a minute.”
I draw in a hitching gasp, on instinct reaching for his side and holding on. As my fingers dig into his side, alerting him to real fear, he eases the gun away from my forehead.
; Coincidence? I have an awful feeling that I know what he’s doing, but he doesn’t want me to talk, so I keep quiet.
“You’re going to do everything I tell you to do. You’re going to let me take whatever I want. You don’t want this, and you can beg me to stop, but I won’t listen. If anyone ever finds out about this, if anyone ever asks, you did beg me to stop and I ignored you. Understand? Open that pretty little mouth right now and tell me you don’t want this.”
I swallow audibly before forcing that lie past my lips. “I don’t want this.”
“Good girl.” Everything inside me goes soft at those words from his mouth, at the tender reassurance in his tone.
As much as I do want this, I don’t want to put him in danger. I want to play scary, sexy games with him, but more than that, I want to protect him.
“Sin…”
“No. We’re back to no talking, Laurel. Keep that pretty mouth shut until I tell you to open it again. Nod once if you understand.”
I nod once.
“Okay. When all this is over with, after I’ve taken what I want from you, you’re going to put your skimpy little robe back on and go about the rest of your night. You are not going to tell anybody what I did here, do you know why? Because then someone will get hurt. I don’t mean someone’s feelings, either. If you care about Rafe, if you want to keep him safe, you keep your fucking mouth shut. He comes after me, he won’t come back.”
My heart drops at the threat. I don’t think he means it, but I do know he’s capable, so it’s actually not impossible.
I know that Sin knows my safe word, and I’m tempted to use it, but I can’t get it out of my mouth. I’m not sure if I’m more afraid to utter it because he might stop, or because he might not. I’m 90% sure this isn’t real, but what if I’m wrong? I do remember him asking me if I’d fight him if he fucked me, so I was mentally prepared for him to be into some kinky shit. I haven’t explored that kind of play, but I would try it out with him. I didn’t think a gun would be involved, I just imagined him pinning me down, making me helpless with his body…
I sigh, my stupid body responding to my own damned thoughts. Fuck, I like when he’s dangerous.
I should try to stop him, though. Even if my heart feels like it belongs to him, even if my body is fully on board, I’m not his to play with and this should not happen. If Rafe ever found out about this… God, it makes me sick thinking about it.
This is a dangerous fucking game Sin is playing, if that’s what this is. High stakes doesn’t even begin to cover it.
“Now, get on your knees, Laurel.”
32
Laurel
I look down at the pillow, then lower myself until I’m on the floor in front of him. It’s been so long—too long—since I’ve been down here, but I take a moment and close my eyes, keeping my head bowed.
“What do you want, Laurel?” he asks me.
I don’t know the right answer. This position fucks with my head, and I don’t know what’s going to happen when I open my eyes and look up at him. I remember what happened before. I also remember his instructions though, so with my head down and my voice low, I tell him, “I don’t want this.”