Afterward, curled up in his embrace, she tried not to wonder how long it would last.
That first night, bad dreams aside, she felt she was exactly where she was meant to be. With him.
This time, in the quiet as he held her, she thought about his other life.
As if he could sense her wheels turning, Ethan squeezed her and asked, “What’s going on up there?”
“Hm?”
“What are you thinking about?”
Her stomach dropped, and she decided to go with something a little more subtle.
“I think I want to get a tattoo.”
“Yeah?” He dropped a kiss on her shoulder. “What kind of tattoo?”
“The Eiffel tower. Maybe a little one, right here.” She reached back to point behind her left shoulder blade. “But I don’t feel like I can get the tattoo until I’ve been there and actually seen the Eiffel tower first.”
“That makes sense.”
Nodding slightly, she added, “I think I’ll wait until after I get married; I’ll probably go strapless and I don’t want a tattoo in my wedding photos.”
“This seems like a complicated decision,” he remarked.
She cracked a smile. “I can’t seem to commit to it. Someday. Before I’m 30, anyway.”
“You think you’ll be married before you’re 30?” he inquired.
“Probably. If I ever get married, I guess. I don’t know.” She missed half a beat, not giving him time to respond. “What about you? Think you’ll ever remarry?”
“Aw, I don’t know. Honestly it hasn’t crossed my mind. I think it’s in bad taste to consider remarrying before you’re even divorced,” he pointed out.
“Ah, right,” she said lightly, as if she hadn’t even considered it. “I’m still sampling the goods, huh?”
He was quiet for a few seconds. “I don’t really know what’s going on with that.”
“What do you want to happen?”
He didn’t look entirely pleased. “Are we having this conversation already?”
“We don’t have to,” she said, simply.
Ethan quieted again, and Willow already regretted bringing it up. After a few more seconds of silence, he said, “I know that I love being here with you. I know that I’m lucky you’re so understanding, and wonderful and amazing…”
Smiling despite herself, Willow said, “This is you trying to butter me up, isn’t it?”
“Is it working?”
“It is,” she verified. “Proceed.”
He dropped another kiss on her bare shoulder. “Not to mention sexy beyond belief. Funny, smart, confident, cool enough to stick with me through the trying times in my life, despite the lack of stability you obviously deserve.”
“Man, you are lucky,” she said, playing along. “That, or your girlfriend’s as dumb as a rock.”
Chuckling, he said, “Definitely not.” Then, after a breath: “Girlfriend, huh?”
Her heart missed a beat. She’d thrown that out there to see how he responded, but she was also half afraid of what his response would be.