Observing her for a few more seconds, he said, "Did someone say something to you?"
Emma, but it wasn't her fault Julie was distant.
Instead of saying that, she asked, "What do you think someone would say to me?"
"I don't know," he said, watching her a little more carefully. "You seem kind of mad at me…"
Sighing, she said, "I'm not mad at you, Aaron, I'm…" But she stopped, shaking her head. "Just… it's not important, I'll deal with it."
"Is it something I did?" he asked, frowning a little. "I didn't mean to offend you."
"Don't worry about it," she said dismissively.
But he still looked mildly uncomfortable, and then he went on to say the one thing that could annoy her to the point of snapping at him.
"If it's about earlier…before Becca interrupted… I'm sorry about that, I just—”
"Ugh, Aaron, just… don't. Okay?" She looked up at him then, a flick of irritation in her eyes, but she tried to clear it from her expression. "You don't like me that way, you're just an affectionate drunk. It is fine. I get it. You have made yourself clear, it's not something you have to apologize for."
"It isn't that," he said.
"Yes, it is. You don't have to tip-toe around my feelings, Aaron. I have had a heavy dose of reality since I moved to Chicago, and that's fine, because maybe that's what I needed, but I don't need you to coddle me and I don't need you to apologize. It is what it is, right?" she said, shrugging her shoulders and offering a half-hearted smile. "It's fine. Don't worry. I'll feel awkward for a weekend, and then I'm sure everything will return back to normal. And hey, you're drinking, so if you want to help you can just pretend not to remember and we might even be able to cut out the awkwardness altogether."
"It's not that I don't like you, Julie," he said, looking a little bit torn.
"Really, Aaron? Because to my knowledge, when you like a girl, you kiss her. You don't avoid being around her all the time, you don't shun her advances when you're drunk—”
"I already told you," he said, a touch irritated, "I am looking out for your best interests."
"Well, you're not my parent or my stockbroker; that's not your job. It's noble, but it's not your job, and it's not what a guy does when he likes a girl. You know how a guy acts when he is interested in a girl? He wants to kiss her. He can't stand seeing another guy dance with her. When he's drinking and she wants to cuddle, not only does he cuddle with her, Aaron, but usually things go even a step further—especially when they're sharing a damn hotel room together for the weekend." Rolling her eyes a little and shaking her head in mild frustration, she went on, "Please just forget that this conversation and the entire evening almost happened. I don't even know why I'm telling you all of this, I just… realized it, and… I don't know, but just pretend not to remember tomorrow and I'll go along with it, okay?"
She couldn't look at him then, as she had just opened up way too much for comfort, so she continued to dance a little stiffly in his arms and watch other people dance over his shoulder.
Aaron said nothing to her response, thus validating every word of it in her mi
nd.
In the moment, everything had just come spilling out, but as the comfort level decreased with every breath, she began to wish she would have kept her mouth shut and had her little epiphany in her mind only.
So she was having romantic inclinations toward Aaron. They were not returned. Therefore, rather than worsening the situation by telling him about it, she should have kept her big mouth shut.
Apparently future-planning was not her strong suit when it came to men. From emotionally unavailable guys who still loved their exes she upgraded to guys who claimed to love her but couldn't stay faithful, then on to married men who seemed genuinely unhappy in their marriage until they got caught and then changed their tune, finally to the married man's brother who played the reluctant knight-in-shining-armor but was so repelled by the mistakes she had made that he saw her only as his brother's mistress…
She sure knew how to pick 'em.
The only thing they all had in common was their unavailability.
What a wonderful trait to be attracted to.
The song wasn't over, but Aaron pulled her out of her thoughts by saying, "Do you really want to finish this dance or do you just want to go?"
"Let's just go," she said, immediately stopping the forced movement and taking a step back.
But he wasn't even looking at her, he was glancing at a spot just beyond her as he said, "Actually, why don't you go ahead and I'll be up in a few minutes? I'm gonna say goodbye to my family and stuff since I won't be seeing them again soon."
She said okay and nodded, but since he was still gazing past her she felt her curiosity getting piqued, and she stole a peek over her shoulder to see what had his attention.
As if her level of disappointment hadn't been high enough, her eyes landed on Shannon, gazing back at Aaron with her remorseful doe eyes.