What he thought and what he felt terrified him so completely that he reacted the only way he dared.
"Goddamn you, Beckman," he roared, "you are one dumb broad!"
She stared at him for a long, long minute. Then she took a deep, shuddering breath and got to her feet, ignoring the hand he extended, making it on her own even though her legs were so watery they didn't feel as if they belonged to her.
"You're right," she said. Tears of anger glinted in her eyes and she brushed them away. "I am stupid, because just for a minute there, I was going to say—I was going to say..."
She swung away from him, head bowed so that her braid swung forward, revealing the tender nape of her neck, and Conor cursed himself for a fool and reached for her.
"They could have killed you," he said harshly.
She stiffened as his hands closed on her shoulders and then a sound, terrible in its anguish, burst from her throat and she turned and went into his arms. He held her while the moments ticked away, his arms hard around her, his heart thudding against hers, telling himself it was best not to think about anything, certainly not to try and figure out what he was feeling, knowing only that holding her close was the best thing that had ever happened to him, that he was never going to let her go again, and then she stiffened and pulled back in his arms.
The shock that had turned her eyes dark was fading. In its place was confusion, anger and distrust.
"At the risk of sounding like somebody in a bad movie, O'Neil, what's a man like you doing in a place like this?"
It was the million-dollar question, and he hadn't an answer. What could he say that wouldn't infuriate her? The truth, that he worked for the Committee, that he'd worked for it all along? That would only prove him a liar. On the other hand, pretending he was working for Eva again would probably earn him a sock in the jaw.
"I asked you a question." Her eyes locked on his. "Why were you following me?"
Think, he told himself, dammit, think! What he needed was a simple answer, one that wouldn't enrage her or dig him in any deeper.
She took his silence as all the answer she needed.
"Damn you," she whispered. Anger flashed in her eyes, anger and—and what? Disappointment? He didn't know, didn't have time to try and figure it out. All he could do now was talk his way into her life because that was where he knew he had to be, to keep her safe. "Good old Eva. She's got you back on the payroll."
"You're wrong," he said vehemently, "I'm not working for Eva."
"Please, O'Neil, don't insult my intelligence." Briskly, she brushed the dirt from her shorts. "Well, when you report in, tell her you scored ten points today but that it's not enough to guarantee your job security."
"Listen, Beckman—"
"Because if I look around and find you following me again, so help me, I'll head for the nearest cop and swear you're molesting me." She took a step back, folded her arms over her chest and glowered up at him. "You got that?"
His smile was chilly. "What's the world coming to, I wonder? Here I saved the lady's ass and now she wants me busted. Funny way to say thanks."
"You were doing your job, mister. Forgive me if I can't get excited about it."
"I told you, I don't work for Eva."
"Right." She leaned over and brushed off her bare legs. They were grimy and blood was oozing from a cut in her left knee.
"You're bleeding," he said.
"Isn't that wonderful?" she said sweetly. "You're not just a mass of overblown muscle, you're observant, too."
His lips hardened into a thin line. "You've got a smart mouth on you, lady."
"Just remember what I said. If I spot you anywhere near me, I'll have you arrested."
"For what? Stupidity, for thinking I might deserve even a grudging thank-you?"
"Thank you? Thank you?" Her chin lifted in anger and defiance. "What am I supposed to thank you for, exactly? Getting me evicted from my apartment? Getting me tossed out of France? Getting Jean-Phillipe shipped off in one direction and Nita in the another?"
"Wow." Conor folded his arms and rocked back on his heels. "Did I do all that?"
"Good-bye, O'Neil. And remember what I said. You so much as breathe in my direction, I'll have you locked up."