“Tonight is about having fun with your friends. That’s what a thirtieth birthday should be about. Fun. You’ve left your angsty twenties behind. You don’t have the responsibility of the forties. Thirties is all about you.”
“All about me. I like the sound of that.” She sighed. “Sometimes I look back and wonder if maybe I made the wrong decisions. Played it safe when I should have taken a risk.” She waved her hand in apology. “Listening to my sob story isn’t part of your job. Sorry. I never should have drank that champagne. Drink always makes me talk too much. Or maybe it’s just that you’re a good listener.”
“My job is to make sure you have the best time tonight.” She hesitated. “What risks would you have taken?”
“Mostly with my love life.” Crystal looked down at her hands, bare of rings. “I was too careful. My parents divorced when I was twelve and it really affected the way I approached men, dating and my own security. I wanted guarantees and assurances. I never took a step unless I knew I was on solid ground. I was so afraid of falling. I’m aware of it, but somehow that doesn’t make a difference. I didn’t know how to be any different.”
Paige stared at her, mouth dry. She understood that feeling so well, only in her case her need for security and control had stemmed from a childhood of being ill, where others made the decisions for her. She needed control so badly she was afraid to let go and take risks.
Eva stepped forward and put a plate of canapés in front of Crystal. “Eat these. They’re delicious. And if you want my opinion, I think sometimes you just have to take that leap,” she said firmly, “and trust that it will be all right. Trust yourself.”
Paige glanced at her friend.
Was Eva talking to her or the client?
Crystal reached for a canapé. “Like leaping from a plane with no parachute, you mean?”
Paige stirred. “I think the parachute is inside you.” She thought about what Jake had said that night on the roof terrace. “Your skills. Who you are. You have to trust that whatever happens, you’ll cope. I think sometimes we’re so busy clinging onto the present that we don’t lift our heads to see what might be out there. We think safe is what we know, but sometimes the unknown turns out to be the better option.”
When Paige lost her job, she’d felt as if she’d lost her security, and yet here she was in a better, happier place. With Urban Genie the ultimate risk was hers, but the rewards were also hers. Not financial, although she was hoping those would come, but in terms of control. She no longer had to work with other people’s bad decisions. She made the decisions.
And yet she knew in her heart she wouldn’t have started Urban Genie at this point in her life unless she’d been forced into it by circumstances.
She hated it when other people protected her, but hadn’t she been doing exactly the same to herself?
She’d lived her life in a safe way. Made choices that were safe. In her work. In her love life.
And safe choices had their basis in fear.
“It’s natural to want to protect yourself when you’ve been hurt before,” Crystal said. “There’s a lot to lose. But part of me wonders if there’s more to lose by not being courageous enough to take the risk. There was a man, a couple of years ago—” She gave a shrug. “I blew it. I protected myself so carefully he assumed I wasn’t interested. There isn’t a single day when I don’t wake up and wish I’d played it differently. And now it’s too late. I can’t believe I’m telling you this. Tell me to shut up. And don’t give me any more champagne or I’ll be sobbing into the canapés.”
“Are you sure it’s too late?” Paige’s heart was pounding as if it was trying to give her a wake-up call. “It’s never too late to tell him how you feel.”
“In this case it is. He met someone else. Someone who wasn’t cautious like me. They’ve been married a year and have a baby on the way. I wish I’d done things differently, but I didn’t. I was scared. And now I’m paying the price. But hey—thirty is a whole new start, right? It’s too late for that relationship, but I could still meet someone. It’s not too late for that.”
“It’s never too late to live life bravely,” Paige said.
At least, she hoped it wasn’t.
Because that was what she intended to do.
And maybe she’d be hurt, but at least she wouldn’t be hitting a milestone birthday wishing she’d taken a risk on something that mattered.
“I feel better.” Crystal reached for more food. “You should sell your services as a motivational speaker.”
Paige handed her a glass of water, thinking that it was time she took her own advice. “Enjoy your party and instead of looking back, look forward. The view is shiny and bright right in front of you. If you need sunglasses, let me know.”
Crystal drank the water. “I need you three in my life all the time. Urban Genie has done a wonderful job, and the concierge service for clients is genius.” Her eyes widened as she noticed the cupcakes. “Oh! That’s incredible.” She turned as she heard laughter. “They’re here. My friends.”
They piled out of the elevator, armed with gifts, balloons and beaming smiles. A group of women all with one aim in mind—to give their friend the best birthday ever.
Crystal met them with hugs and laughter, and Paige gave them a moment to squeal and admire and catch up before going over to offer champagne.
“Friends,” Eva murmured as Paige headed over to join her and Frankie. “Everything is all right with the world if you have friends. I hope you’re both going to bring me prettily wrapped gifts when I’m thirty.”
“We’re going to pour margaritas down your throat until you can no longer remember how old you are.” Frankie watched as the women oohed and ahhed over the cakes. “They’re pleased. Those women have great taste. Great job, Ev.”
“Yes. Great job.” Paige paused. “Can you believe she lost the man she loved?”