Nik took a deep breath, wondering how honest to be. ‘That is not what is happening here.’
‘No? Well there has to be some reason why you looked at Chloe as if she was a dangerous animal.’
‘This is not about Chloe.’
‘What then?’
There was a long, throbbing pause. ‘It’s about you.’
‘Me?’ She stared at him blankly and he cursed under his breath.
‘You are the sort of woman who cannot pass a baby without wanting to pick it up. You see sunshine in a thunderstorm, happy endings everywhere you look and you believe family is the answer to every problem in the world.’
She stared at him with a total lack of comprehension. ‘I do like babies, that’s true, and I don’t see any reason to apologise for the fact I’d like a family one day. I don’t see sunshine in every thunderstorm, but I do try and see the positive rather than the negative because that’s how I prefer to live my life. I put up an umbrella instead of standing there and getting wet. Sometimes life can be crap, I know that but I’ve learned not to focus on the crap and I won’t apologise for that. But I don’t see what that has to do with the situation. None of that explains why you behaved the way you did in that room. You looked as if you’d been hit round the head with a plank of wood and then you walked out. And you say it was about me, but how can it possibly—?’
Her expression changed, the shards of anger in her eyes changing to wariness. ‘Oh. I get it. You’re worried that because I want a family one day, that because I like babies, it makes me a dangerous person to have sex with, is that right?’ She spoke slowly, feeling it out, watching his face the whole time and she must have seen something there that confirmed her suspicions because she made a derisive sound and turned away.
‘Lily—’
‘No! Don’t make excuses or find a tactful way to express how you feel. It’s sprayed over you like graffiti.’ She hitched up her dress and started to walk away from him and he gritted his teeth because he could see she was truly upset.
‘Wait. You can’t walk back in those shoes—’
‘Of course I can. What do you think I usually do when I’m out? I’d never been in a limo in my life before I met you. I walk everywhere because it’s cheaper.’ She hurled the words over her shoulder and he strode after her, wondering how to intervene and prevent a broken ankle without stoking her wrath.
‘We should talk about this—’
‘There is nothing to talk about.’ She didn’t slacken her pace. ‘I cuddled your baby sister and you’re afraid that somehow changed our relationship. You’re worried that this isn’t about sex any more, and that I’ve suddenly fallen in love with you. Your arrogance is shocking.’
He kept pace with her, ready to catch her if she twisted her ankle in those shoes. ‘It is not arrogance. But that incident upstairs reinforced how different we are.’
‘Yes, we’re different. That’s why I picked you for my rebound guy. It’s true I want children one day, but believe me you’re the last man on earth I’d want to share that with. I don’t want a guy who describes a crying child as an “incident”.’
‘That is not—Cristos, will you stop for a moment?’ He caught her arm and she shrugged him off, turning to face him.
‘Believe me, Nik, I have never been less likely to fall in love with you than I am right at this moment. A little girl was distressed and all you could think about was how to extract yourself from a relationship you’re not even having! That doesn’t make you a great catch in my eyes so you’re perfectly safe. I understand now why you have emotionless relationships. You’re brilliant at the mechanics of sex, but that’s it. I’d get as much emotional comfort from a laptop. Seriously, you should stick to your technology, or your investments or whatever it is you do—’ She tugged her arm from his grip and carried on walking down the path, her distress evident in each furious tap of her heels.
He stared after her, stunned into silence by her unexpected attack and shaken by his own feelings. In emotional terms, he kept women at a distance. He’d never aspired to a deeper attachment and when his relationships ended he invariably felt nothing. He had no interest in marriage and didn’t care about long-term commitment.
But he really, really cared that Lily was upset.
The feeling was uncomfortabl
e, like having a stone in his shoe.
He followed at a safe distance, relieved when she reached the terrace and ripped off her shoes. She dumped them unceremoniously on a sunlounger and carried on walking. The braids of her Grecian goddess hairstyle had been loosened by the wind, and her hair slithered in tumbled curls over her bare shoulders.
A man with a sense of self-preservation would have left her to cool down.
Nik carried on walking. He walked right into the bedroom, narrowly avoiding a black eye as she swung the door closed behind her.
He caught it on the flat of his hand, strode through and slammed it shut behind him.
She turned, her eyes a furious blaze of blue. ‘Get out, Nik.’
He shrugged off his jacket and slung it over the nearest chair. ‘No.’
‘You should, because the way I feel right now I might punch you. No, wait a minute, I know exactly how to make you back out of that door.’ She tilted her head and her mouth curved into a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. ‘You should leave, Nik, because I’m—oh, seconds away from falling in love with your irresistible self.’ Her sarcasm made him smile and that smile was like throwing petrol on flame. ‘Are you laughing at me?’