It had to stop right now.
No more embarrassing herself. No more embarrassing him.
She turned her head to look at him but he was staring straight ahead, his handsome face blank of expression.
‘Thank you,’ she said.
‘For what?’
‘For asking us to do this. For giving us free rein and no budget. For trusting us. For inviting influential people and decision-makers. For making Urban Genie happen.’ She realised how much she owed him. ‘I hate accepting help—’
‘I know, but that isn't what happened here. You did it yourself, Paige.’
‘But I wouldn't have been able to do it without you. I'm grateful. If you hadn't suggested it, pushed me that night on the terrace, I wouldn't have done it.’ She breathed in. Now was as good a time as any to say everything that needed to be said. And if she said it aloud maybe it would help both of them. ‘There's something else—’ She saw him tense and felt a flash of guilt that he felt the need to be defensive around her. Definitely time to clear the air. ‘I owe you an apology.’
‘For what?’
‘For misreading the situation the other night. For making things awkward between us. I was…’ She hesitated, trying to find the right words. ‘I guess you could say I was doing an Eva. I was looking for things that weren't there. I was close to panic and you were trying to distract me. I understand that now. I don't want you feeling that you have to avoid me, or be careful around me. I'd never wanted that. I—’
‘Don't. Don't apologise.’
He gripped the railing and she noticed his knuckles were white.
‘I wanted to clear it up, that's all. It was a kiss. Didn't mean anything. Two people trapped in an elevator, one of whom was feeling vulnerable.’ Shut up right now, Paige. ‘I know I'm not your type. I know you don't have those feelings. I'm like your little sister. I get that. So—’
‘Oh, for— Seriously?’ He interrupted her with a low growl and finally turned to face her. ‘After what happened the other night you really think I see you as a little sister? You think I could kiss you that way if I felt like that about you?’
She stared at him, her heart drumming a rhythm against her chest. ‘I thought— You said— I thought you saw me that way.’
‘Yeah, well, I tried.’ He gave a humourless laugh and drained his champagne in one mouthful. ‘God knows, I tried. I've done everything short of asking Matt for a baby photo of you and sticking that to my wall. Nothing works. And do you know why? Because I do have feelings, you're not little and you're not my damn sister.’
Shock struck her like a bolt of lightning.
They were the only two people left on the terrace. Just them and the Manhattan night. The buildings rose around them—dark shapes enveloping them in intimate shadows and the shimmer of light.
The storm clouds were gathering, creating ominous shadows in the dark sky.
The sudden lick of wind held the promise of rain.
Paige was oblivious. The sky might have come crashing down and she wouldn't have noticed.
Her mouth was so dry she could hardly form the words. ‘But if you feel that way—if you do have feelings—why do you keep saying—’ She stumbled over the words, confused. ‘Why haven't you ever done anything about it?’
‘Why do you think?’
There was a cynical, bitter edge to Jake's tone that didn't fit the nature of their conversation. None of the pieces fitted. She couldn't think. Everything about her had ceased to function.
‘Because of Matt?’
‘Partly. He'd k
ick my butt. And I wouldn't blame him.’ He stared down at his hands, as if they were something that didn't belong to him. As if he was worried about what they might do.
‘Because you're not interested in relationships—or “complications” as you call them?’
‘Exactly.’
‘But sex doesn't have to be a relationship. It can just be sex. You said so yourself.’