First Time in Forever (Puffin Island 1)

She heard him talking over the radio, but she had no anxiety to spare for the pilot or the fate of the plane. Everything was focused on Lizzy who lay with her eyes still closed.

She felt another lurch of fear.

Was it going to happen again?

Was she going to love, only to have the person she loved ripped away from her?

She barely noticed the plane lifting off, gave no thought to the yawning expanse of the bay or the hungry bite of the wind, both ready to consume a small plane in a moment if the pilot made any mistakes.

Zach made no mistakes.

The flight was bumpy, but Emily was too occupied with Lizzy to dwell on the possibility of plummeting into the ocean. If she hadn’t been so worried, she would have thanked him for what she was sure was flawless and courageous flying. But there was no room for anything in her head but the panic.

They landed smoothly, and from there it was a short transfer by ambulance to the medical center where the pediatric team was waiting.

Lying in the room, surrounded by medical equipment, Lizzy opened her eyes. She looked ridiculously small and vulnerable. “Are you going to leave me here?”

“No.” Emily was appalled she would even think it. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“My mom always left if I was sick. She didn’t want to catch anything. She said being ill made her ugly.”

“I’m right here and I’m staying right here.” Emily felt an ache in her chest, and she took the little girl’s hand. “I won’t leave you.”

“Where’s Ryan? I want Ryan.”

The pitiful plea shot straight through Emily’s heart, and her only thought was me, too.

“He can’t be here, sweetie.”

It shocked her just how badly she wanted him to be.

The doctor wrote something on a chart. “Is there someone you need us to call? If you give us this Ryan’s number we can contact him.”

“No. He’s—” How to describe their relationship? “He’s just a friend.” A friend with other commitments. Other priorities. “There’s no one.”

The doctor accepted that and then sat down to take a medical history.

Emily realized how impossible this was. How had she ever thought Lizzy’s past could be kept a secret? “I don’t know much about her history,” she admitted. Left with no choice, she briefly told the doctor all she knew.

“So you don’t know the identity of Juliet’s father?”

“No. And I know nothing about her health as a child, although the lawyers did give me details on her vaccinations.”

“Do you have those?”

Emily pulled the papers out of her bag, telling herself that it was ridiculous to be concerned that they knew Lizzy’s identity. The medical team had to know. And everything here was confidential, wasn’t it?

“We need to take blood, Miss Donovan. If you’d rather wait outside—”

“I’m staying.” She didn’t even let him finish the suggestion. “You can work around me.” She kept hold of Lizzy’s hand, talking to her about the puffins, Ryan and the twins, anything to distract her while the medical team worked.

The next few hours were a blur of tests, bright lights and beeping machines. Of needles, sterility and stress.

Lizzy barely reacted, her eyes closed, the blotches on her skin vivid against the white background.

The walls were covered in a mural, a farm scene, and Emily stared blankly at brightly colored fields until the white dollops of paint started to look more like clouds with legs than sheep.

Her eyes were gritty and her head throbbed.