With a sigh he leaned forward and removed the redundant fork from her numb fingers. ‘It’s big, yes. Of course it is. But I’m not scared of commitment. And I’m only single because I’m very, very choosy.’
‘Have you ever been in love?’ The question flew from her lips before she could stop it, and he paused for a moment.
‘Yes.’ His voice was quiet. ‘Once.’
‘What happened?’
His hesitation was fractional. ‘Before I could say anything to her, she fell in love with another man. Chances are it wouldn’t have made a difference if I’d spoken up earlier, but I made a promise to myself that if I ever met another woman who affected me as much as she did, I was going to tell her straight away.’ He stabbed some food onto the fork and held it to her mouth. ‘Eat, sweetheart. The baby needs it even if you don’t.’
Why did the moment seem so impossibly intimate? The words he’d just spoken? Or the look in his sexy blue eyes or the fact that he was feeding her with her own fork? Whichever, she felt warm colour touch her cheekbones.
If he was choosy, why had he chosen her when she surely possessed none of the attributes that he was likely to look for in a prospective partner? She wanted to ask about the other woman. The woman he’d been in love with. But she was all too aware that she was probing into his life while revealing nothing about her own.
Why did she want to know about him?
Why was she interested?
Confused and unsettled, she took the fork from his hand and finished the food on her plate, knowing that he was right that she needed to eat. The fact that she didn’t feel hungry was irrelevant.
It didn’t matter that he was patient, she told herself as she chewed listlessly. And it didn’t matter that he thrived on complications. It didn’t even matter that he’d been honest and told her how he felt. Their relationship wasn’t going anywhere. All right, so there was chemistry there, she’d be a fool to deny it. But chemistry didn’t make a firm foundation for a relationship. Nothing did.
There was no way she’d risk ever exposing her child to a relationship that would inevitably go wrong.
Not even with a man as seductively attractive as Jake Blackwell.
CHAPTER EIGHT
WHY did he always fall in love with unobtainable women?
Working his way through a busy antenatal clinic the next morning, Jake found his attention wandering back to the previous evening.
Of all the women he’d ever met, he’d never encountered one as complex and wary as Miranda. How could a woman be both spirited and fiercely independent and yet touchingly vulnerable at the same time? What had happened in her past to score such deep wounds through her confidence? What had created that determined independence? Genetic make-up or the influence of family?
There was obviously something in her past, something that she refused to reveal. It was impossible to move forward, to counter her fears and anxieties, when he didn’t understand the cause. He was determined to find out more about her. Determined to give her the confidence to open up and confide in him.
Patience, he reminded himself as he checked a set of blood results that one of the midwives had handed him. Patience. Hopefully, given time, she’d be able to trust him. In the meantime, he was going to make sure that they spent as much time together as possible.
Given that they were working and living together, it proved gratifyingly easy.
He was called up to the labour ward later that afternoon to see Paula Webb, a woman who had been on the ward for two days following premature rupture of membranes.
‘I started having contractions an hour ago. You said you thought that would happen. But I’m only thirty-five weeks, Mr Blackwell,’ she muttered, and Jake gave her shoulder a squeeze.
‘It’s going to be fine, Paula. The baby’s heart rate is doing exactly what we like it to do. Try not to worry. I’ve told you before, that’s my job.’
‘But it’s too early.’ Paula screwed up her face as another contraction took hold. ‘Is he going to end up in an incubator?’
‘I can’t promise that he won’t,’ Jake said honestly, ‘but in all likelihood he’ll be fine.’
‘I really want to have a normal delivery.’
‘And that’s exactly what we want.’ Jake glanced at Miranda, who was looking after Paula. ‘She’s six centimetres now. There’s no reason why she should have any problems but I’m around if you need me.’
Paula looked at him anxiously. ‘What time are you going off duty?’
Jake smiled at her. ‘When you’ve had your baby. I’ll see you later.’
He walked out of the room and Paula gazed after him. ‘He is such a lovely man. One of my friends had Mr Hardwick and she didn’t see him once, not once in her entire pregnancy, but I’ve seen Mr Blackwell almost every time and now he says he won’t even go home until I’ve had the baby.’