Suddenly Last Summer (O'Neil Brothers 3)

Instead, his grandfather stirred. “I didn’t know you felt that way. I didn’t know you were worried about me.”

“Yeah, well, you do now.” Sean dragged his fingers through his hair, furious with himself for losing his temper. “I’m sorry I yelled. Believe it or not, I actually came here to apologize to you.”

“Apologize? For what?”

The words were stuck in his mouth. The emotion was stuck in his chest. “For all the things I said to you at Dad’s funeral. I was out of line. I was so far out of line.”

His grandfather straightened slightly. “You were upset.”

“That is no excuse. You should have told me to shut up. You should have yelled back or something. Why didn’t you?”

For a moment his grandfather didn’t respond.

Then he sank down onto the bench, his hands on his knees. “Because you were crushed by grief.” His voice trembled. “We all were. You wanted to blame someone, and I understood that because I was doing a whole lot of blaming myself. That happens when you lose someone. You only said what I was thinking. It was my fault.”

“No. No, it wasn’t.”

“Maybe not all of it, but some of it.”

“That isn’t true.” Sean’s voice was raw. “I was wrong about that. I was wrong about so many things. And I shouldn’t have said what I did.”

“You lost a father.”

“And you lost a son.”

“Yes.” Walter stared ahead at the mountains. “My earliest memory was playing by the lake with my own father. This place was everything to him and it was everything to me. It never occurred to me to do anything different. I lived it, breathed it, dreamed it. Then I met your grandmother and she felt the same way. It wasn’t just a way of life, it was life. It didn’t occur to me that my son wouldn’t want that life.”

“Dad loved the place.”

“He loved the place, but not the business. Michael wanted no part of that side of things.”

Sean thought of the conversation he’d had with Jackson. “But he didn’t tell you that. He never said that.”

“He was trying to be what I wanted him to be. He didn’t want to let me down.” Walter’s voice was husky. “I should have known. I was so focused on what I wanted I never asked what he wanted.”

“It’s good to be focused. Good to be passionate about something.”

“Not when passion makes you blind.”

“He could have said something. He should have.”

“Possibly. But would I have listened? I like to think I would have, but I can’t be sure. This place isn’t an easy weight to carry, I know that.”

“Jackson loves it.”

“Yes. And I sleep easier, knowing that.”

Sean sat down next to his grandfather, shoulders brushing. “I’m going to come home more.”

“Your grandmother would like that.”

Sean turned his head and looked at his grandfather. “And how would you feel about it?”

Walter cleared his throat. “I guess I’d like that, too. But only if it’s what you want.”

“It’s what I want. I should have apologized to you sooner instead of staying away. And I should have said— I mean, I probably should have told you— I love you, Gramps— Shit—” He ran his hand over his face. “I can’t believe I said that. Thank God Tyler’s not here.”

“Thank God your grandmother isn’t here, with you swearing.” There was a long silence and then his grandfather gave a laugh that was decidedly unsteady. “I love you, too. I thought you knew that.”