She’d successfully secured a future for herself and her child.
Or was she suddenly realising just how high a price she’d paid for that particular social leap?
‘I don’t want to discuss this again.’ Crushing any future urge on her part to dwell on the unfortunate circumstances of their wedding, Casper strolled forward, realising that he hadn’t yet revealed the reason for his return.
‘Y—you’re a bit crabby. Perhaps you need to eat,’ she said helpfully, scooping up a plate from the table. ‘Try one of Pietro’s pastries. It’s a new recipe and they’re really delicious.’
‘I’m not hungry.’ His intention had just been to deliver his orders and then spend the afternoon catching up on official papers. He hadn’t expected to be drawn into a discussion.
Nor had he expected an ongoing battle with his libido.
‘Just taste them.’ Apparently unaware of his reluctance, she broke off a piece of the pastry and lifted it to his lips. ‘They’re fresh out of the oven. Try.’
Drowning in her subtle floral scent and her smile, Casper’s senses reeled and he grasped for control. ‘I have things to tell you.’
‘Eat first.’
Casper ate the pastry and wished he hadn’t, because as his lips touched her fingers again he was immediately plunged into an erotic, sensual world that featured Holly as the leading lady in a scene dominated by scented oils and silk sheets.
She withdrew her hand slowly, her eyes darkening as they both silently acknowledged the dangerous sexual charge that suffused every communication they shared.
‘What is it you need to tell me, Your Highness?’
‘Casper.’
For the space of a heartbeat, she looked at him and then she gave a twisted smile. ‘I don’t think so. I’m not comfortable enough with you. Maybe it’s just because you’ve had a long journey, but you’re very cold. Intimidating. I feel as though you’re going to say “off with her head” any minute.’
‘You can’t call me Your Highness in the wedding ceremony.’
Shock flared in her eyes. ‘I sort of assumed the wedding was off. You haven’t once phoned me whilst you’ve been away.’
Casper thought of the number of times he’d reached for the phone before he’d realised what he was doing. ‘I had nothing to say.’
Holly lifted her hands and made a sound that was somewhere between a sob and laughter. ‘Well, if you had nothing to say to me in two weeks, it doesn’t bode well for a lifetime together, does it? But I do have things I want to say to you.’ She drew in a breath. ‘Starting with your offer of marriage. I’ve given it a lot of thought.’
‘That doesn’t surprise me. I expect it’s been two weeks of non-stop self-congratulation while you enjoy your new life and reflect on the future.’ His cynical observation was met with appalled silence and she stared at him for a moment, her delicate features suddenly pinched and white.
Then the plate slipped from her hands and smashed on the kitchen floor, scattering china and pastry everywhere.
‘How dare you say that? You have a real gift for saying really horrible things.’ Her small hands curled into fists by her sides. ‘Have you any idea how hard all of this is for me? Well, let me tell you what my life has been like since you walked into it!
‘First there is that huge picture of me on the screen so the whole world can see the size of my bottom, then the press crawl all over my life, exposing things about me that I haven’t even told my closest friends and making me out to be some psycho nutcase. Then I discover I’m pregnant, and I was really happy about that until you showed up and told me that you didn’t believe it was yours. So basically since I’ve met you I’ve been portrayed publicly as a fat, abandoned slut with no morals! How’s my new life sounding so far, Your Highness? Not good—so don’
t talk to me about how I must be congratulating myself because, believe me, my confidence is at an all-time low.’ Her breathing rapid, she sucked in several breaths and Casper, who detested emotional scenes, erected barriers faster than a bank being robbed.
‘I warned you that—’
‘I haven’t finished!’ She glared at him. ‘You think this is an easy decision for me, but it isn’t! This is our baby’s future we’re talking about! And, whatever you may think, I didn’t plan this. Which is why I’ve done nothing but agonise over what to do for the past two weeks. Obviously I don’t want to be married to a man who can’t stand the sight of me, but neither do I want my baby to be without a father. It’s been a horrible, horrible choice, and frankly I wouldn’t wish it on anyone! And if you need that summarised in two words I’d pick “scary” and “sacrifice”.’
In the process of formulating an exit strategy, Casper looked at her with raw incredulity. ‘Sacrifice?’
‘Yes. Because, although I’m sure having a father is right for our baby, I’m not sure that being married to you is right for me. And there’s no need to use that tone. I don’t care about the prince bit, nor do I care about your castle or your bank account.’ Her voice was hoarse. ‘But I won’t have our child growing up thinking that his father abandoned him. And that’s why I’ll marry you. By the time he’s old enough to understand what is going on, you will have realised how wrong you are about me and given me a big, fat apology. But don’t think this is easy for me. I have no wish to marry a man who can’t talk about his feelings and doesn’t show affection.’
Casper responded to this last declaration with genuine astonishment. ‘Affection?’ How could she possibly think he’d feel affection for a woman who had good as slapped him with a paternity suit?
She rolled her eyes. ‘You see? Even the word makes you nervous, and that says everything, doesn’t it? You were quite happy to have hot sex with me, but anything else is completely alien to you.’ She covered her face with her hands, and her voice choked. ‘Oh, what am I doing? How can we even think about getting married when there’s nothing between us?’
‘We share a very powerful sexual chemistry, or we wouldn’t be in this position right now,’ Casper responded instantly, and her hands dropped and she gave a disbelieving laugh.