“The bathroom is here.” Elodie waved her arm and Audrey poked her head around the door.
There was a shower, a toilet and a hand basin, crammed together in a space so small that Audrey would have to keep her elbows tucked in if she didn’t want bruises. But it was all hers. Audrey had never had a bathroom that was all hers. She wouldn’t have to wonder if she’d find her mother crying on the floor, or alcohol stashed behind the toilet. She closed her hand over the key. She’d never been able to lock her door before. Her mother barged in at any time that suited her. For the first time in her life, she’d have privacy. Right now that felt as valuable as cash.
She slid the key into her pocket, feeling grown-up. Maybe that was all it took. A key. A place of your own. The ability to decide what you did with your day. To make choices that weren’t driven by compensating for other people’s mistakes.
She closed the door on the bathroom and walked across to the windows. The floorboards creaked under her feet and she had to duck her head in the section of the room where the roof sloped, but from here she had a view across what seemed to be the whole of Paris.
She opened the window and leaned out. She heard the blare of car horns, shouts from the people below in the streets, the smell of cigarettes and sunbaked streets. Beyond the rooftops she could see the gentle curve of the river Seine, the golden stone of the Louvre and in the distance the bold jut of steel that was the Eiffel Tower.
Across the narrow street was another building, also full of apartments. Through one window Audrey could see bookshelves, tumbling plants and sofas. Through another, she could see into a bedroom.
It made her realize that she needed to close the shutters, particularly if she invited company back.
“It’s great.” She pulled her head back from the window. “Thanks.”
“You can have the rest of the day to settle in and start tomorrow.” Elodie walked to the door. “We open at 9:00 in the morning and stay open until 9:00 at night. Will you be able to handle an early start?”
Audrey had been getting herself out of bed in time for school for what felt like her whole life. She could handle 9:00 a.m., although she had to admit she’d been hoping for more of a lie-in now that she’d left school. Still, as long as she wasn’t expected to actually read the books…
“Great. Can’t wait.”
She waited until the door had closed behind Elodie, and then finally, finally, she was alone.
Alone!
She stretched out her arms and spun on the spot, feeling the space and the silence.
Feeling restless and strange, she unloaded the contents of her backpack onto the bed. Everything was crumpled.
Suddenly exhausted, she sat down next to her clothes.
She’d been dreaming of leaving home for the best part of a year. Having her own place. Living far away from her mother. She’d expected to feel giddy and euphoric, and instead she felt—
How did she feel?
Lonely. She felt lonely. At least at home she’d been able to call Meena and ask her over for a pizza. Here, she knew no one except Elodie and she sensed they weren’t likely to become besties.
She dug out her phone and checked her messages.
There were two from Meena. Sometimes she left voice mail because it was easier for Audrey, but mostly she forgot and typed.
Met anyone hot?
Are you in love yet?
Feeling a little better, Audrey grinned and texted back.
Only been here ten mins.
It was a moment before Meena replied.
Check out Hayley’s FB page. Pics of her by the pool. You need to post some cool pics of Paris to make her jealous.
Audrey checked the page and saw a bunch of photos of Hayley looking smug on a beach with an azure sea sparkling in the background. How many shots had it taken, and how many filters, to achieve that look?
She flung her phone back into her bag and forced herself upright.
Fuck other people and their perfect virtual lives.