“Never before the event, sadly. Only after and then it’s too late.”
“How well I understand that.”
Martha glanced at her. “You were the same? So did you burn Ruth’s letters? Cut them into pieces? If you’d rather not talk about it, that’s fine.”
“The letters currently reside in a drawer at home, along with the ring.”
Maybe she hadn’t opened the letters, Martha thought, but nor had she thrown them away. If she really didn’t want any contact ever, wouldn’t she have thrown them away?
“And you don’t know if she’s still in California? Or if they’re together?”
“I doubt they’re together. He wasn’t capable of commitment. But the letters were always postmarked California, so it seems reasonable to assume that Ruth still resides there.”
“And that’s why you looked a bit funny on that first night when I mentioned California. Going there makes you feel a bit weird. Big place though. You won’t bump into her unless you want to.” But maybe she wanted to. Was that why Kathleen had chosen this particular trip? Had she consciously, or subconsciously, been keeping her options open? Martha stifled the million questions bubbling in her brain and asked just one. “Were you very good friends?”
It took Kathleen a long time to respond and when she finally did, her voice was faint. “Yes,” she said. “The very best. We were like sisters.”
How terrible must that have been? To lose the man you were engaged to was bad enough, but to lose your best friend too?
She was starting to think her situation wasn’t so bad after all. Okay, so she was twenty-five and already divorced, which didn’t look good from the outside to people who didn’t know the whole story, but what other people thought shouldn’t matter, should it? Kathleen hadn’t made her choices based on what other people thought.
Martha lifted her chin. Be more Kathleen. That was her new motto.
Maybe she should see divorce as a life experience instead of a failure. Things happened in life, to everyone. She needed to focus more on the now, and less on the then. She was young, healthy and didn’t have kids to worry about. She didn’t have to stay in touch with Steven. She was in a position to move on, as Kathleen had.
Except Kathleen had also lost her closest friend. That was a double blow,
Martha had a sudden urge to help. Kathleen had already helped her, so the least Martha could do was repay the favor.
“If you wanted to look her up then we could.”
“I don’t want that.”
The flat-out rejection of that suggestion made Martha wonder at the pain hidden behind those words.
What exactly had happened?
Martha decided it was time for distraction. “How about some music?”
“We tried that yesterday. My ears are still in a state of recovery.”
Martha grinned. “That’s my fault for singing along. I can’t help it. I burst if I don’t sing. Forget music. How about I put the top down?” It was a hot day. The sun beamed its approval of that suggestion.
“The top of what, dear?”
“The car. We have this fancy, sexy sports car. We might as well use some of its features. It will probably blow your hair around.”
“That sounds marvelous. Do it.”
Marvelous. When had she last heard anyone use that word?
Grinning, Martha pulled over next to a field. She hit the button, fascinated by the way the roof opened. “It’s very cool.”
“I doubt it will be cool when we hit Arizona.”
Martha started the engine and saw a man gazing at them from a house across the road. She was beginning to understand that far from being everyone’s worst nightmare, this car was considered a dream. It wasn’t quite her dream, but they might get there yet.
Kathleen wound her scarf around her hair and Martha grabbed her phone and snapped a few pictures.