Roland felt real fear in those moments, watching her shudder and heave with sickness, more fear than he’d felt the previous evening when she’d been ill. He said to Salin, who stood behind him, “Bring some water and clean cloths. Aye, and some decent food, some hot broth.” He snorted at the soup on the tray. “If I had to eat that disgusting swill, I would vomit my guts up too. If the brothers say anything amiss, break their necks.”
She felt his hands on her shoulders then and she tried to straighten, to show that she had some pride left, but all she could do was hang her head and tremble and shake, weak as an autumn leaf.
“Come,” he said, and efficiently lifted her into his arms. Rather than laying her onto the narrow cot, he sat on the cot and held her on his lap. “This damned bed is harder than a moss-scraped rock in Wales.” Then he paused a moment, feeling the chill of the room.
Roland frowned. She couldn’t remain here; she would sicken. The abbot had assured him that his wife would be fine, the lying whoreson. What to do? The abbey had such strict rules about females. Did they believe that the sight of a woman would make all the brothers mad with lust?
He felt Daria twist in his arms with another cramp. He held her more loosely, rocking her, telling her it would be all right, soon she would feel better. She quieted and he drew her more closely to his chest. She was shivering violently, and he cursed softly.
“I’ll fetch you the queen’s medicine now.” He laid her on the cot and rose over her. She looked so pale it frightened him. And thin. He supposed he’d be thin too if he vomited all he ate. He shook his head and set himself to looking through her packets. He’d just given her some of the herb medicine when Salin returned.
Daria saw the look on the older man’s face. His eyes were filled with pity. She hated it. She turned away, facing the wall.
“You will lie still for a few minutes, Daria, then eat. I don’t want the broth to cool. Salin, I wish to speak to you outside.”
“One of the brothers told me the chamber’s a punishment cell,” Salin said matter-of-factly when they were alone. “It’s used only when one of the brothers commits a sin. He’s whipped, then forced to remain in one of these chambers for several hours, never for an entire night. He would probably have to murder someone to be forced to do that. And as you now know, the chamber is also used for females who have the misfortune of needing to stop here for the night. Your lady will become truly ill if she remains in there.”
“Punishment cell,” Roland repeated blankly.
“Aye, I asked one of the brothers when you left. He said your wife would sicken but good if you left her here.”
“It’s raining,” Roland said.
“Aye.”
“It’s their abbey and we can’t break their rules, no matter how miserable they are. However, since I can’t take her back to the main building, then I shall have to remain here. Fetch me all the extra blankets you can find. And, Salin, say nothing to our hosts.”
The older man merely nodded and took his leave. Roland returned to his wife, who still lay on her side facing the grim rough stone wall, her legs drawn up. She hadn’t vomited for a while, a good sign, he hoped.
“Now some broth, Daria.”
Her only reply was a groan, but he didn’t hear it. When she didn’t move, he drew her up in his arms and fed her the broth very slowly, watching her expression.
She finally opened her eyes and looked at him, wonder in hers. “I feel just fine now. It is so very odd, this illness. I want to die and then I want to conquer a new land.”
“No fights for you this night. I will remain here with you. If it weren’t raining, I would stay outside these dismal ruins, but as it is, we must be glad for the shelter.”
He continued to feed her and was relieved when the color began to return to her cheeks.
When Salin returned, his arms piled high with blankets, Daria began to smile. Then she giggled, for only his fierce dark eyes showed over the blankets, and Roland, so surprised at the unexpected sound, grinned at her.
He said to Salin, “See that all the men settle in, and don’t let any of them do anything to annoy the brothers. If any of the brothers are bothersome, ignore them. The saints know we wouldn’t want any of the monks punished and sent here to share the cell with us.”
Roland doused the single candle not many moments later. He lay on his side on the miserably uncomfortable cot and drew Daria against him, feeling her press her bottom against his belly. He bore most of the weight of the blankets. Without thinking, he lightly kissed Daria’s ear. “Sleep well,” he said, and pulled her even more tightly back against his chest and into the curve of his body.
Daria whispered, “Do you ever snore, Roland? Not just soft sounds, but snorting and blowing like a horse?”
“I don’t know. You will tell me.”
“You should have to sleep in the same room with Ena. It is a torture in itself. She was once married, you know, many years ago. My mother told me that her husband left her because of the noises she made. He said it wasn’t worth having the woman’s body if he had to suffer along with it the sounds made by a pig and a horse.”
Roland hugged her and she pushed her bottom more firmly against his belly. “Don’t do that,” he said, his voice sharp with sudden pain. “Don’t.”
She felt his hard sex and held herself perfectly still. She didn’t want him to humiliate her as he had on their wedding night. The memory of it brought back the pain of his anger, the pain of the shame he’d made her feel. She shook her head even as the thoughts twisted through her mind. She would forget that night. He’d been frustrated and angry and taken it out on her. He’d been kind to her since then. On the heels of those thoughts, Daria wondered if women always sought to excuse men when they behaved badly.
Roland woke her immediately the following morning at dawn. The rain had stopped during the night but the sun was hidden behind thick gray clouds.
He was on the point of rolling off the cot, taking Daria with him, when he remembered her condition, and said quickly, “Don’t move. Just lie there for a few minutes.” He came up on his elbow and looked down at her face in the dim morning light. “How is your belly this morning?”