“You won’t chase her and shoot her, will you, Papa?” “Not at all.”
“That’s good. Only I get to do that. Make her smile, Papa. I like to see her smile.”
Evangeline heard Bunyon’s voice but didn’t see him. In an instant Edmund was gone, and she was alone with the duke. He didn’t move toward her, just stood there, looking at her. He closed the nursery door.
“I came as quickly as I could,” he said. Then he held out his arms to her. “Come here.”
And she did. She didn’t run to him as quickly as his son had, but she was in his arms in but an instant. “It’s all right now,” he said against her hair as he stroked her back. “I’m here now. It will be all right.” All the pain and guilt broke inside her. She sobbed against his neck, uncaring, out of control, but he said nothing, merely held her, stroked his large hands up and down her back, slowly, steadily, and she cried and cried. She clung to him like a limpet, her arms tightly hugging him to her.
When her sobs became hiccups, he lightly kissed the top of her head. “It’s all over now, Evangeline. I promise you it will be all right.”
“No,” she said, pulling back, “no, nothing is all right, nothing at all.” Had it not been for her, Mrs. Needle would be alive, but she couldn’t tell him that. Then Edmund would die. She struck his chest, wishing that she herself would be hurt. He ignored her blows and continued to hold her. When the Chesleigh servant had brought him her letter, the anger he was still trying to clutch to himself against her was lost in the shock of his old nurse’s death and Evangeline’s plea to him. He locked away his grief and set himself to comfort her.
Finally, there was nothing left in her, no more tears, no more violence, just an emptiness that was destroying her. He loosened his hold and pressed a handkerchief to her hand. When she did nothing with it, he took it from her and wiped her face—a beloved face, he realized, and it shook him to his very core. But he knew that it was true. Her eyes were swollen, and she was so pale it frightened him. Odd that she had grown very fond of Mrs. Needle in such a short time. It didn’t matter. She was distraught.
Evangeline whispered into his handkerchief, “I’m so sorry, your grace. I’m glad you have come. I haven’t known what to do.”
“You’ve done more than you should. It is I who am sorry that you’ve borne all the burden.” For an instant he saw such suffering in her eyes and so many other emotions that he didn’t understand. He didn’t let her go. He wasn’t about to let her go. He pulled her closer. “We don’t have to speak about it now. I don’t wish to hurt you more.”
She shook her head and got a hold on herself. She’d let her guard down, and it was dangerous. She had to keep her secrets to herself. “No,” she said finally, slowly pulling back from him. “No, you must know what happened so that you may act. Baron Lindley is as effective a magistrate as Edmund is a dragon slayer.”
“Dragon slayer? I thought he only wanted to hunt down highwaymen.”
“When I read him a story about a dragon slayer, he was excited. He’s just not certain that I’ll be able to breathe fire at him when he’s chasing me.” She laughed, then choked on that laughter, wanting to die.
“It’s all right. Laughter makes you forget for a moment. It’s good.” He held a chair for her, and she sat down, smoothing her gown with long, pale fingers. He remained standing, his shoulders against the mantelpiece. He knew in that moment that he was seeing her with new eyes.
She looked back up at him, the man who’d become the center of her thoughts, whose son was so dear to her now that she knew she’d simply lie down and die if something happened to him. What was she to do? The truth hovered, damning words that would forever make her his enemy, words that would earn his condemnation, his contempt. But the words remained unspoken, not because she was a coward. What held her again was the threat to Edmund. Now she had no doubt that John Edgerton would carry out his threat to kill the boy if she betrayed him. She had already brought death to his home. And lies, but lies were better than more death. “Baron Lindley believes the murderer was a man to whom Mrs. Needle gave a love potion. This potion evidently killed his sweetheart. It makes not a whit of sense to me, but the baron is quite pleased with himself. He has the gout. He came quickly upon this solution and quickly left to go home to a brandy and a cushion for his foot.”
“Nothing was missing? Nothing stolen?”
She shook her head.
“I’m surprised he didn’t immediately latch onto some poor tinker, the bane of Lindley’s existence. Thank you for dealing with him. I’ll see him again, for I must. Damn, I should be the magistrate, could easily have been some two years ago, but there were too many other things to occupy my time.” He shook his head, frowning, she thought, at what he thought was a failure in himself. “There’s no motive for this. Who would possibly want to kill Mrs. Needle?”
Of course she knew. She knew everything. She looked away from him. There was pain at his loss in his dark eyes, and it killed her to see it and know that she could avenge the harmless old woman.
“You’ve made all the arrangements. I thank you.” He eyed her, seeing her pallor, the strange hardness in her eyes that he didn’t understand. “You’re tired. Bunyon and I will take care of Edmund. I’ll see to whatever else has to be done.”
She leaped to her feet. “No, please, I don’t want to be alone—that is, I don’t want to rest. Please let me stay with you.”
He didn’t understand this either. “You don’t want to be alone?”
She’d made a mistake. He seemed so attuned to her. It was disconcerting. “Perhaps,” she said, rising slowly, not looking at him.
He laid his hand upon her shoulder. “You can stay with me if you wish it.” He added after a short pause, “Death is always a shock. I remember when I found out about Robbie’s death. I was bowed to my knees. It took a long time for me to even see the preciousness of my son, to enjoy laughter once again, to see the beauty of a woman and not feel the deadening rage and helplessness. It will pass, Evangeline, the shock, the grief. But you won’t forget, no, you’ll never forget and that is perhaps for the best.”
But not the guilt, she thought, not the guilt. She merely bowed her head, saying nothing.
The following afternoon Mrs. Needle was buried in the Chesleigh graveyard, the resting place of both family and servants for more than two centuries. Evangeline stared at the mound of fresh earth while the vicar lamented the cruelty of Mrs. Needle’s death, the duke’s gloved hand holding her steady. She raised her eyes to the castle, to the north wing where Mrs. Needle had lived. The thought of the duke returning to London and leaving her again at Chesleigh seemed too much to bear. She shivered. It was very cold today, as a February day should be. Over a quiet dinner after the funeral, as Evangeline wondered what she was going to do, he said slowly, “You need a change, Evangeline. This hasn’t been pleasant for you. Would you care to visit London for a while?”
She looked at him, unspeaking, disbelieving that he would offer her this chance. She didn’t deserve it. She realized then that he expected her to deny him once again, but before she could speak, he said, “You and I haven’t always dealt well together. Perhaps we can remedy that away from Chesleigh. You have told me that you don’t want to go to London, that if I forced you, you would leave me. I don’t want that. But I want to take you away from Chesleigh for a short while. Edmund too, naturally.”
Sh
e saw that this strong man, this man who knew his own worth, was afraid she would turn him down again. She wanted to throw herself into his arms and shout her gratitude to him, but she didn’t. She said simply, “Thank you, your grace. I would much appreciate going with you to London. It is very kind of you.”
He hadn’t realized how much her acceptance would mean to him. He slowly let out his breath. He slowly raised his glass of port and said as he saluted her, “My mother will be very pleased. She wants to meet you as well as see her grandson.” He saw the relief in her expressive eyes and knew he would protect her with his life.