"I know, Connor. I do. I just…"
Deciding that putting Ben in this position for any longer isn't fair, I throw open the door and stride out. "What Ben is trying desperately not to share is that me and Asher fucked last night," I blurt without regret. "He tried his best to resist, but I guess I'm just irresistible. Ben walked in on it. Asher is riddled with guilt for doing something that is against your bodyguard bro code. As far as I'm concerned, we're all adults, and we can do what the hell we want. I don't regret it. It was awesome. And, as your client, I would appreciate it if you didn't make a big deal about this. Asher is a grown man. I'm a grown woman. And that's it." Putting my hand on my waist, I cock my hip, wanting to demonstrate that my body language matches my tone. Staring at Connor, I wait for him to react to my challenge.
"Fuck," Connor says, lowering his lids and shaking his head. The way his shoulders slump speaks of great disappointment, but I'm not having that.
"Fuck, nothing," I say. "Orgasms should never be something that we regret. Put yourself in Asher's shoes. If I dragged you into my room and made you sketch me wearing next to nothing, wouldn't you be tempted to cross the line? If I took your hand and pressed it against my breast, would you have the restraint to resist? If no one was looking, wouldn't it cross your mind to just go for it? Be honest."
As I gaze around at the six men in front of me, I swear I can see arousal painted across all their expressions. There's a power in this feeling. Power in owning my sexuality and my needs. Power in being unapologetic about indulging them.
"We all would have been tempted," Jax says. "Hell, I couldn't say if I could have resisted you if you did all that to me."
"You've been thinking about it, haven't you?" I take a few steps closer until I'm just a couple of inches from his body, gazing up into his soft brown eyes. "You've been thinking about what it would be like to make a move on me. What it would be like to taste me." I let my hand trail his lapel, watching as his lids lower with arousal.
"And you…" Turning to Elijah, I raise my hand to his face. "I've seen you watching me. I've seen the sex in your eyes." His cheek is rough with stubble as I stroke it with my fingers.
"And you…" Hudson doesn't move when I slide my fingers into his palm. "When you were reading to me about Berlin, and I rested my feet against your thigh, you imagined what it would be like to run your hand up my leg."
Gazing into Ben's gunmetal gray eyes, I see the worry there that he's messed everything up for his friend. "And you touched yourself when you got back into bed last night, didn't you?" Ben shifts uncomfortably, and the truth of my words is obvious to everyone who's watching.
"And Mo. You might hide behind your serious facade, but it's there in your eyes and the way they linger on my curves. It's there in the way you touched my hand earlier." The small smile he gives me in response just confirms what I knew.
"And you, Connor?" Reaching up, I take hold of the long part of his tie, adjusting it to make it straight and proud. "I've seen the look in your pretty green eyes. I've seen it all. You can rail on Asher, but any one of you could have been him last night."
As the words leave my lips, I realize that I've given away a lot in that statement. It's as much about them putting themselves into Asher's shoes as it is about my feeling toward all of them. If I was anyone else, I'd be worried that there are seven men in my life that I like enough to invite into my bed. But knowing that my brother lives in the very same setup means this doesn't feel taboo or wrong to me. It's just another way of living. Something that consenting adults can do and should be able to do without judgment.
"I would have resisted, Luna," Connor says softly. "I would have because I understand the risks.”
"You really think that in the heat of the moment, when it's dark, and there's no one around, and you're horny, and I'm there, willing and waiting, that you would have put business first?"
"It's not just about business," he says, his voice tight as though he's holding pain behind a veneer of normality. "It's about your safety."
"My safety? You think that you can't keep me safe and fuck me at the same time?"