Strings Attached

“It’s not a thing, okay? Not a serious one. I need to make sure you understand that before I continue with what I called to say.”

“Okay,” Mom replied softly. “Is everything all right?” Her voice was full of questioning concern. In fact, it had been a little off since the beginning of the call, now that I thought about it.

“Yes. Is everything good with you?”

“Of course it is. But you obviously called to tell me something, so let’s have it.”

Let’s have it, huh? I didn’t even know where to start, how in the world to do this. “Harrison is forty-one,” fell out of my mouth, and I wished I could snatch the words back. Why had I told her that? But then it was probably important she knew it. If she did come here thinking we were in a relationship, she’d have been surprised when she realized his age.

“Okay. I didn’t see that coming, but it’s not a huge deal.”

“He’s also Ross’s dad.”

There was a short pause on the line. “Oh! He really is just your friend? I didn’t believe you. I thought you were just trying to keep something from me. It’s nice that he’s been so helpful to you. I wish I could do those things for you.”

No, Mom, you really don’t. Please don’t even think that because, gross.

My chest tightened. It was suddenly a little hard to breathe, like her words were a fist around my throat, a weight on my chest. She thought Harrison was nice to me in a parental way. I’d told her Harrison’s age, and who he was to Ross, and that automatically made her think there couldn’t be more to us…because it didn’t make sense, right? We were too different, our age being only one of the reasons. The last part of what she’d said pushed its way through to the front of my thoughts, and I said, “That’s not why he does nice things for me. He doesn’t see me as his son’s friend…” Or, God forbid, like a son. “We’re friends, and Harrison is a good person. I do things for him too.”

Nothing like lending him a car, but I tried to always be there for Harrison.

“I didn’t mean to make it sound as if you weren’t friends. I’m sorry if that came off wrong. I just really thought you were dating and didn’t want to tell me.” She chuckled.

I kind of felt like throwing up.

“We’re getting off-track here. I wanted to talk to you about Thanksgiving. I was thinking…well, you haven’t gotten out of town in a while. It would be good for you and Molly both. Do you guys think you’d want to come to Atlanta for Thanksgiving? I could come and pick you up and then take you home. I have the whole week off, so you could spend a few days.”

“Oh…wow…you’re cooking that big of a meal?” she teased. I’d never done that in my life and didn’t plan to start now.

“Well, no…we’d be at Harrison’s…and I know that sounds weird, considering what I just told you, but Ross and his girlfriend will be there too. Harrison’s friend and his husband are coming. They invited me—invited us—and I just wanted you to get a feel for my life here. I can take you to some of my favorite places. I know you’ve been to Atlanta before, but not since I moved here.” God, I was rambling. Shut up, shut up, shut up!

“We’d stay at your condo?”

Fuck. This was a mess. And made absolutely no sense. Why had I thought this was a good idea? “We’d actually stay at Harrison’s. He has more space. There are only two rooms at Ross’s, but at Harrison’s place, you and Molly could share and I’d have my own.” Because I sure as hell wasn’t going to sleep in Harrison’s bed while they were there. “And I can come and get you—shit, I already said that.”

Mom was quiet for a moment, the silence bearing down on me before she asked, “You really want this, don’t you? For us to come.”

She knew me too well. She could hear it in my voice. “Yeah, I mean, like I said, just so you can get a feel for my life now.” I would not tell her again that I could come and get them.

“I don’t want you to have to come and get us. That’s not fair. I had some work done on the car anyway. It’s running better than it has in years.”

“You did?” I frowned. How in the hell had she swung that?

“And we’ll leave early. The drive is only two hours, but if Molly and I take it in thirty-minute increments so I can get out and stretch, it should be fine.”

“I don’t mind coming there, Mom.”

“No, no. That’s okay. It’s important to me that I do this on my own.” Because she didn’t want to seem like she couldn’t. She didn’t want to depend on me. I understood that.