After leaving Radleigh in his dressing room I had difficulty shaking the conversation from my mind. Something about the tone of his voice, and the truth he’d spoken about what I looked for in a man had got to me. The problem was, the only men I’d ever known who challenged and excited me were the ones who didn’t want to be in a relationship. They wanted to challenge and excite multiple women, with no concern for who they hurt. Miguel was the closest I’d ever got to having everything I wanted, and somehow, it still wasn’t enough.
When the end of the day rolled around, I was relieved. The easiest part of my afternoon was my session with Bryce. Aside from Freya, he was the only person who didn’t think I deserved to be treated so harshly. He assured me that there were really only a handful of people who were looking at me differently. Most of the guys on the team didn’t care for gossip and those who did would forget about it soon enough.
I couldn’t wait to knock back a few glasses of vodka when I got home, but someone was waiting for me outside.
Jesse.
His face, u
sually radiating happiness, was drawn and confused. I didn’t know how he was going to react to me in light of the fact that I’d found out about Taylor’s accusations way before he did, and I was part of the reason she got caught out.
“Hi,” I said.
Jesse’s eyes filled with tears. I rushed towards him, letting him collapse against me. The sound of his sobs broke my heart and I wrapped my arms around him and held him tightly for a long time. When he’d released enough of his grief to speak, he looked up, red-eyed and said, “Can we go for a walk?”
I nodded. “Sure. Let’s go to the beach.”
I linked my arm through his, and we took the shortcut beside my apartment building until our feet reached the hot sand.
I could tell Jesse had a lot of questions and I wanted so much to apologise to him for not telling him everything Taylor had done but the words wouldn’t come. My heart was heavy because of the stupid things I’d done, but it weighed so much heavier when I thought about what Jesse was going through.
We kept walking until we reached Genie’s, a small bar situated on the beach which was often the haunt of surfers relaxing after a day of riding the waves. We went inside and ordered some soft drinks before sitting down in one of the booths.
“Jesse, I’m so sorry,” I said, finally breaking the silence. “I should’ve… I didn’t …”
“I’m not mad at you. If I was, I wouldn’t be here. I wanted to apologise.”
“What? Why?”
“Because I think what Taylor did is partly my fault. I’ve been thinking about it, and I knew she always had a thing for McCoy, even before the night at the club. I had no idea she was crazy but I think she was kind of … jealous of you.”
It was an insane notion that a gorgeous eighteen-year-old with a hot boyfriend and a bright future as a soccer wife might be jealous of a twenty-six year old who spent a large proportion of her time fending off a horny sportsman. But in her warped mind, I suppose it made sense.
“She never admitted to it,” Jesse went on. “But I think she’d been following McCoy for months. She didn’t like how much attention he paid to you. She used to make little digs about you, saying stupid stuff like how she didn’t understand what he saw in you.”
“Wow. A girl can never hear that enough.”
“No, come on, it was all jealousy. I just didn’t realise until now.”
“That doesn’t make it your fault.” Jesse shrugged, and I said, “Have you spoken to her today?”
He shook his head but his jaw clenched as if the idea of talking to her ripped his heart out all over again.
“Last night after Richard told me what happened, I called her and asked her to come to my apartment. I needed to hear it from her. She cried and said you’d all made it up. How stupid does she think I am? There was a lot of yelling, and eventually she broke down and told me the truth. You know the worst part? She didn’t even say she was sorry. Not to me, not to you, not to McCoy. She walked out, like I didn’t matter at all. I guess I didn’t. I was just easy access to what she really wanted.”
I’d seen some crazy fangirls in my time, but I’d never known anyone to stoop so low to get close to another person. McCoy wasn’t worth that level of scheming, and Jesse didn’t deserve to have his heart broken by a girl with a hidden agenda.
I reached out across the table and held his hand. “It would be so easy for me to patronise you and tell you that you’re young, you’ll get over it. Those things are true, but you’re not a kid. And I’m not going to treat you like one. I made mistakes here too, Jesse. I should have made her tell you what was happening, or I should have told you myself. I thought I was helping her to protect you because I believed what she said.”
“I would have believed her too.”
“You loved her. I should have seen through her but I was so angry with McCoy and I thought he was capable of it. I didn’t even stop to question her.”
“He called me.”
“McCoy?”
“Yeah, this morning. I thought he’d be mad about everything she did, but he said he was sorry for what happened. He said he shouldn’t have flirted with her, and maybe he made things worse. He wanted to make sure there were no hard feelings between us.”