“I didn't want to wake up and find that you weren't there.”
Slowly, I raised my head again and this time I didn't look away. I fixed my eyes on his as the first tear slid down my face. “You're so stupid. All this pain, and feeling so … empty. All you had to do was tell me the truth.”
He shook his head. “That's not fair. You weren't so honest yourself. I asked you if you wanted to be with me and you said no.”
“I thought you were trying to wind me up! I didn't think you were serious!”
“I didn't know I was serious until you said no.”
I furiously wiped the tears from my cheeks, but I wasn't angry with Radleigh. I was angry with myself. Because of our own fears and stubbornness, we’d ruined our relationship before it had even begun.
He reached for my hand. “I don't wanna fight.”
I was getting tired, and the amount of revelations I’d discovered were beginning to make my head ache. An hour ago I’d been trying to force myself to accept that Radleigh and I were not meant to be together, and now I was hearing that I hadn't been in it alone.
And he was holding my hand.
“Come back to L.A. with me.”
“I don't know,” I said, even though my stomach flipped with excitement at the idea. “Too much has happened.”
Gently, he pulled me onto his lap and looked into my eyes. “Please don't make me go back without you.”
I knew for sure that he meant it. But I wasn't ready to take him up on the offer. I needed to sleep, clear my head before I could make the decision to uproot my entire life again for him.
“I need to think,” I told him. “It's nearly four a.m, I have to meet my brother and nephew for breakfast in a few hours and I haven't been to sleep yet. Can we please pick this up again tomorrow?”
“Aren't you supposed to be going home tomorrow?”
Amazed at how he seemed to know so much without actually having asked me, I said. “Yeah, I'm supposed to.”
“But you're gonna stay?”
I nodded. “There’s still a lot to talk about.”
He gently brushed my hair from my face and I shivered as his hand touched my cheek. After a slight hesitation, I put my arms around his neck, finally allowing myself to breathe in the familiar, freshly showered scent I’d missed while we were apart. “Will you stay here with me tonight?”
Just in case this all goes wrong again, I need you to stay with me tonight. I want that night you threw away.
“I didn't bring my pyjamas,” Radleigh said, facetiously.
“Me neither.”
Radleigh let out a small groan of frustration. “Don't be such a tease.”
I laughed. “I'm actually not kidding, but I can throw something on if you can’t control yourself!”
“I can barely control myself when you're fully dressed. But I'll risk it.”
Rolling my eyes, I stood up but the beginning of something resembling happiness started to consume me. Things were far from being sorted out, but this was more than I’d ever expected.
I slipped my bathrobe down over my shoulders, and hung it over the back of the chair, fully aware that Radleigh's eyes were following me.
“Anyone would think you were expecting company,” he said, of my perfectly matched black lacy bra and knickers.
“Well, I was considering bringing Bryce back here after we'd finished at the club,” I teased. “So I thought I should be prepared. I didn't want him to see me in my grey granny pants.”
“Very funny,” he said as I climbed into the bed.