And It All Comes Down To You

“Marnie.”

The sound of his voice made me shiver – although I’m sure the cold rain had something to do with it too. I turned as he approached me, wrapping my arms around myself as he got closer.

“Marnie? What’s wrong? Did I say something to upset you?”

Cringe.

“No. God, Logan, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to-” I trailed off, unsure how to explain.

He placed his hands on the tops of my arms and I raised my head to meet his eye. “Marnie, what…? Why did you walk out?”

“Please, Logan. I just need a second.”

“You’re getting soaked again, though.” He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and I allowed him to lead me away from the pavement and back towards the shelter of the pub. The awning hanging over the beer garden provided us a little respite from the rain, although we were both drenched once again.

Shit. Why did I make such a big deal out of this?

Logan’s arm dropped from my shoulders and he turned me to face him again. “I’m really sorry if I said something stupid.”

I shook my head again. “You didn’t. I did.”

“No, you didn’t.”

“I almost did.”

“Why did you stop yourself?”

I laughed. “Because saying that requires more bravery than I have.”

Logan’s hand slid from my shoulder up to my cheek, brushing away my tears and raindrops with the pad of his thumb. The move made my stomach tighten. It was a far more intimate movement than I’d expected or was used to from him. He took a small step closer to me, not close enough for our bodies to to

uch, but close enough that he could probably hear my heart beat. It was loud enough to drown out the sound of the cars, the rain, and the faint music from inside the pub.

“Let’s pretend you are brave,” he said. “What would you say?”

This was it. My chance. My moment. With his brown eyes gazing into mine, I took a deep breath and said, “If I was brave, I’d say that today was the best day ever. That I’ve waited since I was a dorky twelve-year-old to spend this much time with you. That I’ve thought about you almost every day since I’ve known you, and over the past year, you’re the first thing I think of when I wake up. I’d tell you that if we spend too much time not speaking, I doubt everything. I worry that you never really liked me, and you just… I don’t know… felt sorry for the girl who so obviously has a thing for you.” I paused to wipe away a fresh wave of tears. “I’d tell you that I’m scared we’ll go home tomorrow and I won’t see you for months, and I’ll let myself forget how amazing today has been. And I know it wasn’t perfect, but it kind of was because we’re both here together, and that’s something I’ve wanted for as long as I can remember. It all comes down to you, Logan. Every time.”

Logan closed his eyes, blowing out a slow breath, and a huge shuddering sigh pushed past my lips. I’d ruined it.

I pushed his hand away, but as it fell from my cheek, he used it to take a hold of my waist. “If you were brave,” he said, softly.

“Right. But I’m not. I’m stupid. And I’m sorry.”

I attempted to push him away again but Logan pulled me closer, and this time our bodies did touch. Our wet clothes seeped into each other, and I stared at him, confused. Why hadn’t he said those words I’d expected to hear every time I’d imagined telling him how I felt? “Marnie, you’re a really nice girl, and I love having you as a friend, but...” Those were the words I’d tried to run away from, because they had to be coming, didn’t they? Only in movies does the guy say what you truly want to hear.

“Marnie. Do you think I invited you out today because I have no other friends? Or that I suggested staying over because I couldn’t be bothered to drive home again? I wanted you to come with me, and I didn’t want to go home because if we had I wouldn’t have had the chance to spend the day with you.”

“What?” The word spluttered out because I hadn’t fully taken in what he’d said. It was hard to do with him so close. So focused on me.

He smiled and I couldn’t help it, I rested my hands on his damp hips. Part of the reason was to keep myself upright as his words began to trickle into my consciousness. The other part was that I wasn’t afraid anymore. It was okay to touch him now.

God, it felt good.

“I don’t stay away from you because I want to. I stay away from you because I don’t know if you really want me around.” He laughed softly. “Well, I didn’t know.”

My eyes narrowed slightly. “How could you have not known? And if you thought that, why did you invite me to the festival?”

He tilted his head to one side. “If you thought I felt sorry for you, why did you come?”