I tapped my pencil against the blank page, waiting for the muse to strike; difficult since Drew’s nervous energy zapped at my concentration. I should have been working on the first draft of some illustrations for a children’s book; a story about a rabbit that gets lost in a supermarket. The thought of landing a job I’d wanted for so long made me giddy. Illustrating a children’s book since had been a dream of mine since childhood, when I used to illustrate my own, somewhat lame works of fiction. I hoped to be to a writer what Quentin Blake was to Roald Dahl. Of course, the chances of that were much slimmer if I couldn’t make a damn bunny appear on the paper.
Instead, I began to sketch the outline of a face. With no-one in mind, I let my pencil do the work. As the face began to take shape – female, with huge curious eyes – there was a knock at the door.
As he strode into the room, he grinned. His long hair - dyed dark brown with purple highlights and hints of his natural blond at the roots - was tied back for once, and a crisp white shirt and black trousers clung to his slim frame. Unlike Drew, Jason thrived on his new popularity. Regardless of what Drew and I did, Jason had probably already called some of his city buddies to hit the town, as if his biggest screw-ups hadn’t been exposed to the world. For the millionth time, I couldn’t help but wonder how he and Drew could possibly be related.
Drew eyed his brother subtly, as if he didn’t care whether Jason had watched the interview or not; his stance was way too rigid to be carefree.
“You okay?” Jason asked.
Drew gave a single nod. “Yeah. Did you watch?”
“Of course. I was only in the bar because it’s cheaper than cracking open the fridge in my room, and you took forty minutes to get back here from the studio.”
“Well, that’s London for you.” I placed my sketchpad on the bed. “So, what did you think?”
“I think our album sales are about to go up again.”
Money, money, money. No concern for his brot
her, no questions about how he felt.
“What? Didn’t you think it went well?”
Across the room, Drew gave me an ‘I told you so’ look, and I said, “Drew made the feud believable. But I still think the whole thing is a terrible idea.”
A spectacular understatement. Every torturous incident Drew had mentioned during his interview had wrapped around us all, choking the life out of what we used to be and moulding us into the people we’d become. Somehow, we’d come through those rough spots, but this re-hashing of events we’d all rather have forgotten was a harsh and unwelcome reminder of the hell we’d been through.
“Relax, Ellie.” Jason sat beside me and slung his arm around my shoulders. “We’ve got it under control.”
Maybe he thought he had this under control; Drew most certainly didn’t. I ducked out from under Jason’s arm, and stared into the curious eyes I’d drawn. They didn’t have the answers either, so I picked up a pencil and continued shading, bringing more life to her inquisitive features.
“Drew, did you ask Ellie about next week?”
“Not yet. I thought she might have had enough of us after today.”
I lifted my head. “I’ve known you for seventeen years. I’m still here, aren’t I?”
The smile Drew threw me awoke the butterflies in my stomach and I silently begged them to go back to sleep so I could speak. “Crazy woman. Do you want to come to Scotland with us next week?”
I’d travelled around the UK and Ireland with the band many times. Each new place gave me a new experience, new inspirations to draw from. However, towards the end of last year work became my priority and I hadn’t been on the road since mid-November. I itched to get back out with them. Travelling with my boys was one of my favourite things, and I refused to let some media fairy-tale change that. The only obstacle was my looming deadline. When I said so out loud, Jason scoffed. “I remember when you left your uni assignments until the night before they were due.”
“Yes.” I laughed, lightly clipping him around the ear. “Usually because you dragged me out to clubs every weekend when I should have been studying. But I didn’t have bills to pay then.”
“Oh, come on! Can’t you pretend to be irresponsible for a couple of days? The only thing is... Derek wants Drew and me to travel separately in case anyone sees us together.”
I blew out a breath. The whole divide and conquer idea was working out well for Derek. Divide the brothers, conquer the music industry.
“Where and when?” I asked.
“A small club in Glasgow on Thursday night. Derek reckons after this month and all the publicity we’ll be playing bigger venues in no time.”
“You’d better be.”
“It’s a means to an end, Ellie. Don’t worry so much.”
“Well, the end better come soon. Album sales aren’t worth all this drama.”
Jason stared out of the cab window as we slowly rolled out of the airport car park towards the club Razes Hell would be playing at later. The rest of the band had been in Glasgow for a day already, since they drove the long journey in the band’s van. I’d chosen to fly to Scotland with Jason for two reasons. The long journey in the van bored me senseless, plus I hadn’t had much time to spend with him since Razes Hell’s super fast rise to fame. We always used to travel together, the three of us, but since we’d been banned from touring in our usual way, I’d become piggy in the middle, bouncing back and forth between my two best friends; another unwelcome complication of this stupid situation.