Into the Light

“Adriana, I’m sorry.”

It was all I could manage. She stood at the doorway not making eye contact with me, a tear falling down her cheek before she walked back into the house. I watched as my mother bowed her head, disappointed that this glorious moment was taken away from her because of my infidelity. My father stood there, his face stern. I had never in my life seen my father this way. It was a side of him that frightened me, I don’t know why since I was fucking twenty-three, an adult. I knew I was to blame for this whole situation. That was the only thing I was sure of.

The car drove off passing the town and onto the interstate. I started to panic, the reality setting in that I would no longer see her, no longer kiss her beautiful lips and hold her in my arms. Samantha must have sensed the anxiety I was feeling as she laughed to herself causing me to turn my head and face her.

“Don’t even think about using your phone. Your father disconnected it an hour ago,” Samantha gloated.

Was this her plan all along? Closing my eyes, I replayed what my father had said. This baby didn’t deserve to suffer because of me. I knew that but how could I ignore the gut wrenching pain I felt knowing I would never see Charlotte again? This wasn’t the path I chose but as long as Samantha was carrying my baby, I really had no choice.

“Lex. I’m so sorry.” I didn’t know what else to say. I knew bits of the story but of course only from Charlie’s side. It was impossible to hide the sorrow I felt as he spoke. To think how Charlie must have felt, to place myself in her shoes for just a moment. I understood now why she struggled to trust him. The pain she endured was none that I would wish on my greatest enemy.

“I was trapped and weak. I tried several times to dial her cell but would hang up like a coward. The damage was done. I know I hurt her, I apologized and begged for forgiveness but there’s something more, something she’s holding back. I don’t know what it is...please tell me what it is?”

He looked at me like a lost little boy. Desperate to find the place he calls home. What could I say? I had my suspicions because there were parts of her story that didn’t add up but this was not the place and this was not the person to be talking to. It wasn’t even my story to tell.

“Charlie is a very private person. It’s only now that you’ve come back that she has opened up about that time of her life. Look, go back to London and do what you need to do. I will keep an eye on her here. In the meantime, leave her the fuck alone.”

“Why are you helping me?” he asked with a low voice.

“Because she deserves to be happy, Lex, and you are it for her. That soul mate bullshit doesn’t just happen for everyone. Sometimes it does if you’re lucky, but you have to work hard at getting it right. It doesn’t always fall into your lap so perfectly. She’s my girl, so don’t do anything stupid to screw this up. You love her? Then make sure this doesn’t happen again, you understand?”

He nodded and thanked me before heading out of my office. I was beyond exhausted. This day had kicked my butt and I wanted nothing more than to see my family.

Walking into my apartment an hour later I was greeted by Will. I held him tight in my arms and smothered his face with kisses. His smile as usual melted my heart and I thanked my lucky stars that this beautiful child was brought into this world.

Rocky followed, leaning in to kiss me. “Long day, babe?”

“Exhausting. I’ll tell you about it later,” I said as I held onto Will till he complained that he couldn’t breathe.

“Well, there’s someone here to see you.”

I walked into the kitchen and low and behold I found Charlie sitting at the counter. She smiled awkwardly. I hadn’t seen her since our fight and, to be honest, she looked like shit tonight. Her skin looked pale, not the usual bronze, glowing, sun-kissed tan she sported. The dark circles around her eyes were not hidden behind any makeup. She looked tired, drained and I sighed as I noticed how thin her frame was. She obviously hadn’t been eating. It was only now that I realized the magnitude of how much this ordeal affected her.

“What am I doing, Bulls?” she sobbed, placing her head down on the counter. I threw my stuff down and hugged my best friend.

“I’m so sorry I said those things to you, of all people,” she said, her words barely audible as the tears fell down, smothering her face.

“C’mon. Let’s talk.” I grabbed her hand and led her to the den. It didn’t matter what names she called me, what she accused me of. What mattered was that she needed me and she was finally ready to talk. It was the moment I realized my best friend was in a very dark place. I no longer took sides. I no longer acted in defense. I held her hand walking along this dark path, reminding her that no matter what happened in the end, I would forever be by her side.

Chapter 2

Lex

* * *

From: Lex Edwards

Subject: I’m Sorry

Sent: October 12th, 2012 2:34am

To: Charlotte Mason

Charlotte,

Please just hear me out. All that stuff was fabricated. Victoria Preston is a colleague and while she has made advances on more than one occasion, I have very firmly put my foot down. There is no other woman for me but you. Please don’t do this to us. We were trying to make this work and both of us need to trust each other. I would never do anything ever again to betray you. I lost you the first time and am not that stupid to make the same mistake twice.

Talk to me please, baby, don’t do this. I know you read my texts. Just please email or call or text me. Tell me what you are thinking.