Chasing Love (Dark Love 1)

“Mmm… the same as how happy you make me?” I smile, allowing his loving gaze to consume me.

His face relaxes like he’s been waiting all night to hear those words. “I like hearing you call me your fiancé.”

“I could’ve introduced you as my partner, but that sounds like we’re lesbian lovers or something.”

“I won’t object to eating you out all the time,” he teases.

“Neither would I.”

I’ve always loved the banter between us, never taking our relationship too seriously. It’s one of the best things about our relationship—the butterflies over such simple conversation, except tonight, my happy butterflies are battling, or more like knocking the living shit out of the nauseous ones. I’m not doing anything wrong, so why do I feel so guilty?

We laugh as we dance, his body against mine. I close my eyes, enjoying this moment of bliss. Make this work, Charlie, I keep chanting in my head. I deserve someone who will love me and only me.

“Mind if I cut in? For old time’s sake?”

The blood drains from my body as he speaks the words. It’s one thing to talk to him but another to be in close physical contact.

Julian narrows his eyes with a pinched expression, but being the gentleman he is, he quickly kisses my cheek and tells me he will be over by the bar. Lex grabs my hand without consideration for Julian leaving and places the other on my hip. The tightness in my chest causes my smile to waver. The sheer touch of him is causing a massive meltdown inside. He smells just like I remember—home.

Careful not to close my eyes, I refuse to go back to that place. What was once a meadow filled with love, promises, and sunshine has become a dungeon torturing me with pain. Nine years of trying to escape him, and now, he’s holding onto me on the dance floor as if nothing ever happened between us.

I dance quietly, the band singing ‘How Deep Is Your Love’ by the Bee Gees. Trying to focus on anything besides him the lyrics sound in my head, making the moment more intense than it should be. The band needs to switch it up, play some heavy metal rather than

a song about belonging to each other.

“Charlotte, you really do look beautiful. Your favorite color, I see.”

I still remember when I told him emerald was my favorite color on the dance floor at prom night. This is déjà vu, only this time without the happy ending in the classroom. The memories, all of which have been bottled up, begin to leak painfully slow.

Pulling away, slightly, to distance myself from him, I stare him right in the eye. “What do you want, Lex?”

“I see you at the restaurant, and you ran from me. I run into you again, and you avoid me. Can’t two long-lost friends catch up after nine years?”

“Why do you keep saying we were friends? Because from memory, you upped and left. Friends don’t do that.”

“But we are, or should I say were? According to you, it was just a fling. It meant nothing,” he deadpans.

He has me there. I was kidding myself by saying that, but I wanted more than anything for him to believe it. Why should he have the satisfaction of knowing how much pain he put me through? The jerk ruined my life. And I’ve spent a long time trying to fix what he so easily broke.

I quickly change the subject. Now isn’t the time nor the place to dig up old memories, and I don’t want Julian staring at us, wondering why my face looks ready to attack.

“Why are you here, anyway?”

“One reason… Adriana. She drags me to these things and makes me donate a shitload of money.”

“So, you’re no longer practicing medicine?”

“There’s so much we need to talk about, Charlotte. I don’t think the dance floor at this charity ball is the place. Meet me for a drink tonight and we can talk properly then.”

He sounds so controlling. I mean, he always had that trait, but now I look at him differently. The weak man who chose his wife over me, instead of fighting for what he claimed he always wanted. I ignore his comment, avoiding being alone with him at all costs.

“How long have you and Julian been together?”

And there it is.

I’ve been waiting for him to bring up Julian.

The anger takes over again, ruining the moment. “Why, Lex? Does it matter? What about you? I’m guessing you’re no longer with Samantha since you hooked up with another blonde.”