Why the hell did I ever trust him?
He can’t just be with me.
He always has to have his way.
Someone else on the side, and I’m so sick of being that other woman. He’s nothing but a fucking liar, a player, and I’m so stupid for believing his lies, again, for believing him when he said he loves me.
This anger has taken over, poisoning every positive thought I have of him, of us. No one can understand the outrage I feel right now. How much I hate him for making me love him again. That’s the thing that hurts the most. It isn’t about loving him again, it’s more about awakening the love which never disappeared. Fate has now reared its fucking ugly head and screwed all this shit up. This sick, cruel, twisted game forced upon me and drained me of all my beliefs, all my hopes, telling me that maybe he’s my soulmate, and we are meant to live happily ever after.
By the time I reach my building, my phone has twenty-five missed calls and a dozen text messages. I can’t bring myself to read the texts.
Throwing the phone against the wall, I watch the screen crack as I scream in the basement, letting out my frustration. Leaning against the wall, I slide down, falling to the hard, concrete floor.
My tears are spilling out, the sobs leaving my chest gut-wrenching, and the pain spreads all over my body. My throat is dry, I am unable to form any words. I have to hide, run away from all this madness. I crawl over to where my phone lays broken on the ground. I can barely make out the numbers as my vision is clouded and the screen has a big crack, but I text his number and wait patiently for him to arrive.
Time is lost, my surroundings unfamiliar, but the voice, the words echo.
I can’t understand what’s going on.
The faint sight in front of me. What’s happening?
The warm arms I feel around me. This is safe, I have nothing to fear.
“Charlie… Charlie… Charlie, please look at me!” The voice is panicked.
I smile as I see his face, now able to focus.
“You came,” I mutter, my voice croaking.
“Of course, I did. Please look at me. What happened?”
The pain swells in my chest, the momentary realization knocking me cold.
“What date is it today?” I cry.
“Charlie, it’s September twenty-first.”
“I need… to… get… out… of… here,” I sob.
Placing his arms beneath me, he carries me toward the elevator as I rest my head in his chest.
“Take me somewhere, anywhere but here, anywhere but home. Take away this pain, please? Make it go away. Please? I don’t want to go back there. I can’t go back to that awful place,” I scream.
“Shh. I’ll take you away from here. It’s okay. It will be okay, Charlie, I promise.”
The numbing starts, and I know the protocol. This is the second step of the coping mechanism. The third will be ignorance, and fourth will be the bitterness shown in the light of day. The sweet revenge accompanied by hurtful words that one day will be said, followed by regret.
Her words from long ago keep replaying like a broken record, and somehow, I have to let history repeat itself. I let the big bad wolf—or as my mother referred to them as Dark Angels—strip me bare of everything I have fought so hard to rebuild.
My heart is absolutely broken beyond repair.
He’s the most beautiful man you’ll ever see. His soul will capture you but don’t be fooled, Mi Corazon. He’ll use all his powers to draw you in when there’s nothing left to do but take the one thing you’ve been holding on to.
When I was eighteen, I wasn’t wise or mature enough to know love is the most powerful thing in the universe, and so I allowed myself to accept it in all its glory. I learned the hard way, it also leads the path to the darkest place that exists.
Now, I believe I have it all figured out. Yes, love is the most powerful thing, I accept that, but this time I’m armed and convinced that I know which path is the road to happiness, my happily ever after.
This is no longer the fairy tale my momma read to me. This is the sequel. The story of the Dark Angel, who rode back into my sunset disguised as Prince Charming, only this time my armor is shattered, my will to fight obliterated.