Chasing Us (Dark Love 2)

The whole house illuminates as everyone gushes like watching fireworks on the 4th of July.

It’s breathtaking.

There’s something about Christmas lights that brings out the inner child in each of us. The lights are shining so bright, the warmth rushing over me, the spirit alive as we all admire the work that Lex has done. I turn to look at Lex carrying Amelia in one arm and Andy in the other. Both of them are wide awake, enjoying the spectacle and babbling in baby talk as they point to the moving reindeers that Lex installed on our roof.

He turns to look my way and mouths the words ‘I love you.’ I mouth the words back, then rest my head against his arm.

Amelia tugs on my sleeve. “Momma, looky,” she babbles, turning my face to look at the lights.

Adriana comes up beside me and holds onto me tightly. Her smile is gracious as she focuses on the house, then moves her eyes to the stars above.

I don’t know how I spotted it, but there on the ground in front of me lays a white feather. I reach down and pick it up handing it to Adriana. She leans across to Andy and hands it to him.

“See, Andy, I told you Daddy was here.”

There are angels all around us. Sometimes we can see them and other times we can’t. If you look carefully, all around us there are clues. There are some that are placed on this earth as a gift from God, and there are some that are around to protect us from harm and evil.

And then there is mine, my dark angel.

He does everything my mother said he will do, and one other thing she doesn’t know he’s capable of—he loves me. He gave me not just one, but two angels of our very own.

They say there is a light at the end of every tunnel, but they never tell you how long the tunnel is. Sometimes, we stand looking into the dark with the hint of light peeking its way through, and sometimes, we stand looking into the tunnel with only darkness surrounding us.

Things happen for a reason, good or bad. We never truly understand why, instead, we live in a world of regret, focusing on what can never be changed—the past. Sometimes when we are lost in our current happiness, it dawns on us that without mistakes, without regret, we wouldn’t be where we are today.

Once upon a time, I was afraid of the dark. I lived a life trapped in my mistakes. I questioned why I was forced to look into the darkness. Now here I stand, strong, with an understanding that all I have endured made me who I am today. It made me understand the strength and power of love. It made me understand that life may hand you bananas, but sometimes you just need to beat the odds and somehow figure out how to make lemonade.

There will always be darkness in the world we live in, but how we survive is measured by the love that surrounds us. I know that no matter what happened in the past, what will happen in the future, there is and will only ever be one man who has my heart, one man whose love has no bounds.

Alexander Matthew Edwards.

My husband, my soul mate, my forever.