“You can’t have your cake and eat it, too. Sometimes you’ve got to make decision
s and deal with the consequences, whether it be good or bad. I’m a realist. I stepped away from a relationship even though it wasn’t easy.”
“But you don’t think with your heart.”
“Of course, I do. I loved Jason—”
“But you wanted more,” he interrupts. “Tell me, what’s your heart telling you now?”
He is asking me a question I dare not answer truthfully because if I do, there’s a huge possibility my heart will be exposed and shatter if he walks down that aisle with her. But on the flip side, I’m sick of this emotional rollercoaster and walking on eggshells.
“It’s telling me that love is a constant battle. The man who steals my heart… I want him to fight for me. I want to be the only woman he thinks about, the only woman his heart beats for. I want to be the object of his desire, the body he worships every day. I want to feel like nothing in this world exists if he doesn’t feel all those things for me.”
Behind his glasses, his beautiful eyes are consumed by my words. I know he feels something, but how much? I have no idea. My fingers ache to reach out and caress his face, but I’m terrified. The tiny human lying between us is at stake. One wrong move and his life changes forever.
“You deserve all that and a man who will give you that.”
On cue, my heart sinks, confirming what I’ve known all along. He cares. Just not enough. And maybe these thoughts in my head need to stop, just like my relationship with Jason. I pulled the plug when things weren’t as they should have been. If I did it once, I can do it again.
Masen’s gentle snores start as he falls asleep peacefully at my breast. Haden lifts him slowly and pats him, prompting a loud burp before moving him to his crib and wrapping him tight. Lying here, semi-naked, I’m vulnerable both physically and emotionally. Haden removes his shoes and climbs back into the bed with me, this time moving under the sheets. My body appears flushed, and the way his eyes are laced with desire can only mean one thing.
“Presley, I can’t hold this back anymore.”
His luscious lips have found their way to mine, and with his tight grip around my waist, it’s impossible to pull away, especially with my body betraying me. His tongue circles mine as we both moan into each other’s mouths.
Out of breath, I pull away for a brief moment. “Haden, we can’t.”
His lips have already moved to the base of my neck as he mumbles. “I need you.”
The rush he gives me shoots straight down below and between my legs. I’m soaking wet. I’m struggling to hold onto my morals as my physical side demands he give me all of him.
Just one more minute, then I’ll stop.
He knows I’ll stop him, and with a desperate rush, he has made his way down to my breasts, licking circles around my nipples and causing my back to arch in pleasure. It’s difficult to keep my moans to a silent plea, and sensing my desperation, he moves his right hand toward my mouth and covers it with his palm.
“Just let me have a taste… just one taste.”
I don’t have to let him. He takes what he wants, and the moment he sucks on my nipples, an impending orgasm is on the verge of breaking loose. No, no.
“Haden, we have to stop!”
I manage to push him away just as the orgasm is about to hit. Guiding his head back toward my face, I watch his eyes and the fire burning within them.
“We can’t do this. Not while you’re in a relationship. I’m not that person.”
His chest is pumping hard, and trying to catch his breath, he finally speaks, “I know it’s wrong, but I want you, Presley.”
“I want you, too, Haden. But we can’t, not unless you end things with her.”
He pulls back. “Is that an ultimatum?”
“No,” I correct him. “It’s called having morals. I’m not a mistress, nor do I want to have an affair. I can’t deny what I feel for you, but I’m not the one engaged here.”
I see the turmoil in his expression and pull him closer one more time, for one last kiss.
“I should probably go,” he whispers, disappointed.
“You probably should.”