“Our emotions, Logan.”
There’s silence, something that doesn’t surprise me. Neither of us expected the situation to end up here—in bed discussing any sort of ‘emotions.’
“Emmy...” he trails off, running his fingers through his messy sex hair, “… I can’t discuss this now.”
I sigh but keep my posture straight and confident not wanting to show him how much he affects me. “Of course, you can’t,” I tell him with a smile “Go to sleep, Logan. There’s always another time.”
“Good night.”
“Good night,” I whisper, closing the door behind me and allowing my heart to feel the pain.
Wanting more terrifies me.
Not because I’m incapable of falling in love.
It’s because I shouldn’t be falling in love with Logan Carrington.
Chapter Seventeen
“Family means everything to me.
Those joined by blood, marriage,
and those who are destined to be in your life
no matter what.”
~ Emerson Chase.
I couldn’t sleep a wink. My body is still on West Coast time, I’m wide awake and staring at the ceiling. I lay in a room that divides two important people in my life—my brother and the man who consumes me. It would have been selfish for me to drag Logan into a conversation about us with his focus needing to be on tomorrow’s game.
Yet, my brain refuses to shut down.
So many questions need answering.
There are many things that stand against us, and it’s difficult for me to hold back the resentment toward everyone who will have a ‘say’ in our relationship. It’s not just Logan and me. There’s Wesley, Ash, Mom and Dad. Oh... and the whole damn world.
And that’s to say that Logan’s head’s in the same place as mine right now. I know him well. Understand how driven he can be, yet when it comes to matters of the heart, he thinks with his dick only.
And I have no idea if I’m any more than a notch on his belt. After all, he did screw that nurse.
How many other women has he been with while we’re having our stringless fun?
The time on my cell tells me it’s after midnight. So, I toss and turn, desperate to clear my head to no avail.
Me: Do you think people would notice if I fell off the face of this Earth?
I send the text to my sister knowing she will respond instantly since her cell is practically glued to her hand. I made a conscious decision to keep in regular contact with her after my trip back home.
Tayla: Is this about Wesley and Farrah at that club?
Huh? I remember they went to some hip club, but I made no effort to speak to him afterward. He has free rein to do whatever or whomever he pleases. Our ‘almost’ sexual encounter was a huge wake-up call for him. I think it’s finally sunk in how stupid his night in Amsterdam was and everything he lost in his life for a moment of pleasure. It hasn’t stopped him from acting like a jerk, and this season has been the toughest for me trying to keep up the charade. I’m ready to move on.
Me: ???
Tayla sends me a screenshot of Farrah’s Instagram post. It’s nothing unlike what she would typically post, with Wesley’s arm around her in the middle of the club with her ridiculous duck face.
Me: The jerk can piss off with her duck face. I can’t sleep. Why didn’t you come to London with the parentals?