The Sinner

“Truth,” Abby groused. “I still can’t get over no bachelorette party. It’s practically criminal, considering there are two bachelorettes.”

“We have four days to change her mind.” Guy turned his mega-watt smile my way. “See you in there, ladies.”

His cologne lingered in the air, and my gaze lingered on him. Normally, I’d be kicking myself for not mustering even one word of greeting or small talk. But aside from my involuntary blush, Guy’s presence hadn’t cast its usual spell over me. And I couldn’t help but compare Guy’s rugged, blond, outdoorsy-ness to Casziel’s sleek, dark polish. The two men couldn’t be more different.

Casziel’s not a Guy. He’s a man.

“There she goes.” Abby shook her head at me. “God girl, if pining were an Olympic sport…”

My cheeks burned. “No, I wasn’t…I mean, never mind.”

“Knock it off, Abby,” Jana said. “Guy’s a straight-up hottie. If I weren’t happily married with offspring, I’d be all over that too.” She got up from her chair. “On that note, I need more coffee. Anyone?”

We both declined and Jana headed to the coffee/pastry/fruit station Kimberly provided for us every Monday to ease us into the start of the week.

“I think it’s impressive,” Abby said, rolling her chair back to her desk with a little kick of her heels. “How long have you worked here? Two years? You’re like that sad girl in Love Actually. The whole office—including Guy—knows about your crush.”

“Mind your own business, Abby,” I muttered. But I’d said it so softly, she hadn’t heard.

“You should tell him,” she said. “Just walk up to him and say, ‘Guy, it’s been two years. My body is ready.’”

I jumped out of my chair. “We don’t want to be late for the meeting.”

The conference room was a glass-walled space with one long table and ten chairs around it. The screen was for projecting stats and slides from the work Ocean Alliance did all over the world: cleaning plastic garbage out of the water, monitoring oil drilling, and doing coastal preservation.

Kimberly Paul was already there. She dressed less like an executive director of a successful nonprofit and more like a stylish factory worker in short-sleeved, army-green coveralls with heavy boots. Her blond hair was tied up by a Rosie-the-Riveter bandanna. A cluster of colorful precious stones glinted on her left ring finger.

“Good morning, good morning,” she said in her rough Demi Moore voice. “Come in and get settled everyone. As you’re all aware, I’ll be out of the office for one week starting next Monday—”

The room broke into whistles and cheers, which she waved off with a laugh.

“Are you sure you’re ready to let us kids have the house all to ourselves?” Guy asked with a grin.

“I trust you not to burn the place down, but if you want to give me a happy honeymoon, you’ll keep the Big Idea train rolling at full steam.”

The first of every month, Kimberly wanted presentations from the staff about innovative ideas: connections formed with other companies, celebrities we could turn into allies, et cetera. Next Monday was the first of the month.

I turned my shoe idea over and over. I’d worked out most of the logistics already, including cost, design, and environmental impact. The only thing left to do was to take the plunge and present it. While the others tossed around a few pitches, I inhaled slowly. There was too much at stake to not speak up, but…

They’re going to laugh at you.

You’re not prepared.

It’s been done before.

I swallowed a lump of nerves and tried to do what Casziel had told me to do—stop feeding my demons. I knew they wouldn’t magically disappear, but maybe if I talked louder than they did, I’d drown them out.

“I have an idea,” I blurted from my seat at the end of the table and regretted it immediately. The entire room went silent, nine pairs of eyes fell on me.

Abby snorted. “You’re going to present on Monday? Really?”

“Yes, really,” I said, firming my voice.

“Wow, Lucy, that’s wonderful,” Kimberly said. “Can we get a preview?”

“I…I don’t have my materials with me,” I said, cheeks burning under Abby’s dubious smirk and Guy’s curious gaze. “But I can put it all together and present on Monday.”

“Well, I’m thrilled,” Kimberly said. “And a bit disappointed that I won’t be there to hear it.”