Forever Right Now

And maybe it was all for nothing.

Friday morning, Darlene came downstairs to watch Olivia in my place. Her eyes were heavy and warm, and she hugged me tight.

“We’re just friends right now,” she said. “This is a friendly hug, but I’m putting every bit of my positive energy and best thoughts into it that this hearing goes how it’s supposed to. For you.”

I held her tightly, feeling her dancer’s body mold to mine. I closed my eyes, my cheek against her hair, and inhaled her so I could keep some of the light and life she was giving me.

God, you’re turning into a sap.

But I needed all the damn help I could get.

Jackson met me at the Duboce Muni, and we took a train to the Civic Center at eight a.m. Outside the Superior Courthouse, my friend stopped me with a hand to my arm.

“You ready?” Jackson asked.

“No.”

“That’s the spirit!” He chucked me on the arm. “Come on. Let’s do this.”

I smoothed down the lapel of my best suit—a slate gray jacket and pants with a white shirt, and ruby-colored tie. Jackson looked impeccable in blue and beige, a briefcase in his hand. We climbed the steps—me on wooden legs—and into the courthouse where we followed the signs for the Family Court. Jackson spoke in a low voice as we walked.

“This might be a bit of a battle but I’ve done my homework and I’m sure you’ve got the entire Family Law Code memorized.”

“Section 7611, subsection D,” I said.

“Exactly. Additionally, we can show removing Olivia from your custody would be detrimental to her. You’re providing for her in a safe environment and have been for months. Courts don’t like taking children out of good homes.”

“They’re her family, Jax.” I rubbed my tired eyes. “Fuck me, I was so close. A few more weeks and the year would have been up.”

“We can’t worry about that now. Fight the fight in front of us, okay?”

I nodded. We’d arrived at the designated room on the hearing notice. “Breathe. Stay calm. Think positive.”

“Thank you doing this,” I told him. “For taking time off work…”

“Forget it,” he said. “You’re my family, too. And so is she.”

“Jesus, don’t say shit like that,” I said with small laugh. I blinked my eyes hard.

“I’m trying to wipe that serial-killer look off your face,” he said.

I tried to loosen the stiff expression, but I was fighting for my kid. My life. I left the smiling to Jackson.

Inside, the Abbotts were on their side of the courtroom, at a table with Holloway. They turned to watch me come in and the small smiles on their faces faded at my glare. I tore my eyes away. Instinctively, I liked them. Down deep, somewhere beneath the fear, I wanted to know them.

That’s just your shitty childhood talking. They’re here to take Olivia away from you.

I sat down stiffly at the table with Jackson, eyes forward, and didn’t look their way again.

“All rise.”

We got to our feet as the bailiff announced Judge Allen Chen, a stern-looking man, with dark hair that was graying along the sides. He put on glasses as he inspected the paperwork in front of him.

“In the matter of Olivia Abbott, a minor child, there is an order before the Court to show cause for custody filed by Gerald and Alice Abbott, maternal grandparents.” He glanced up at Jackson. “I’ve read the preliminary facts of the case and I’m familiar with the position of Mr. and Mrs. Abbott. I’d like to hear from Mr. Haas, please.”

Jackson got to his feet. “Your Honor, my client has been raising Olivia since her mother disappeared ten months and two weeks ago. At that time, she made it clear that Sawyer was the father of their child. Pursuant to 7611 of the Family Law Code, section one, subsection D, Sawyer received Olivia into his home and openly held out that she was his natural child. He has provided a home, food, safety; healthcare via his university, and has been a devoted and loving father. The law clearly grants therefore, in black and white, that he is her natural father and should retain full custody.” Jackson held out his hands. “Honestly, I don’t even know why we’re here.”

Mr. Holloway rose to his feet. “That is a very narrow reading of the law,” he began. “Molly Abbott did leave Olivia with Mr. Haas, though what she told him with regards to his paternity is a matter of hearsay. The birth certificate, of which we have retained a copy, lists no father. Additionally, neither Mr. Haas, nor his attorney, have provided us with a copy of the results of any paternity test.”