The Girl in the Love Song (Lost Boys 1)

I stared then swiveled my head to River. He stood stock still staring at me, in a coiled, tensed fight-or-flight stance. Then his shoulders dropped, and he put his hands in his pockets as he strode over to me.

“Hi,” I said.

“Hey,” he replied, his glance flying everywhere and then finally meeting mine. “So listen. What you saw—”

“Is none of my business.”

He jerked back in shock. His eyes softened and that same heartbreaking vulnerability I’d seen the other day was back. Then suspicious anger hardened his glance.

“You and I going to Prom together. Aren’t you pissed? Or the least bit curious?” His eyes widened as a horrifying t

hought occurred to him. “Did you know already? He’s friends with Miller.”

“I had no idea,” I said. “No one does. But if it’s a secret, coming here is a terrible way of keeping it.”

The fight went out of him, and his shoulders slumped. There was a bench nearby, and River dropped onto it. His gaze looked for where Holden had gone. “Tell me about it. But I can’t fucking stop…” He rested his forearms on his thighs and hung his head. “You won’t tell anyone, will you? It’ll fucking wreck me.”

“I don’t think that’s true,” I said, sitting beside him. “But I won’t say a word.”

“Not true?” he scoffed.

“It wouldn’t wreck you here at school. We’re in one of the most progressive corners of one of the most progressive states in the country.”

“Forget here,” River said. “Name one openly gay NFL player.” He seemed to realize what he’d said, and his face paled. “I mean, I’m not…gay. I’m not. I’m…fuck, I don’t know what I am.”

“Is this why you want me to go to the Prom with you? To keep up appearances for your dad’s sake?”

He nodded miserably.

“Do you think he’d be upset if he knew?” After spending months with Nancy Whitmore, I couldn’t imagine she’d be anything but completely supportive of her son—or marry someone who wouldn’t be.

Hell, she probably knew before River did.

“I don’t know,” River said. “But I do know that the answer to my NFL trivia challenge is zero. There are zero pro football players who are out. One guy got drafted and lasted all of one season. And for my dad, anything that might keep me from going all the way to the Super Bowl is a massive negative.”

I didn’t have any good advice for River, so I just sat with him, let him lean his huge frame against me for a few moments of quiet.

Finally, he spoke in a low tone. “I’ll understand if you don’t want to go to Prom with me.”

“Forget me for a second. Do you want to go with him?”

“Not going to happen.”

“Is he okay with that? Are you?”

River scowled. “He’s an asshole and I’m a Brokeback Mountain cliché because I can’t stay away. But shit, Vi, you should go with your boyfriend. He says you and Miller are official. Why stick with me?”

“Because I want to keep my word. And, as it turns out, Miller can’t make it anyway. We talked it out. Even if he could go, I’m sticking with you, if you want me.”

“I do,” he said, his smile faint and sad. “You’re probably my best friend. And definitely the only person I trust to not spread my shit all over the school.”

“I never would. And I am your friend, River. Always.”

His grateful smile nearly brought tears to my eyes.

“I’ll take you to dinner first, unlike last time.”

“Last time…” I mused. “Was he the reason you didn’t make it?”