The fiberglass seat is so small, from five year old me. The span of my outstretched fingers now covers the circumference of the steering wheel. The engine components still look decent only because they always leaked, they were all used parts Pop and I scavenged from other projects. But that leaking oil has kept the key engine parts from rusting.
If I replace the spark plug, flush all the fuel and lines, maybe it would start. I’d never fit in it to drive it again and the tires are long since dry rotted, but I can almost hear its high pitched whine and I kind of just want to hear that sound again and remember the simpler time.
Pop looks up from over the tractor deck and wipes his greasy hands in a shop rag and watches me running my hands over the kart. “Always regretted I could never afford a real pro kart for you. We didn’t have one until you got sponsored.”
“It was perfect, Pop.”
“You always fought hard for what you wanted on the track, Lennox. Even when you were a kid, they messed with your kart because they couldn’t beat ya’ fair.”
“I know,” I nod.
“You quit fighting,” he tosses the rag onto a shop bench.
“I’m so fucking tired, Pop.” I lift my head from the kart and glance at him.
“Then you’re fighting for the wrong thing.”
Twenty Nine
“When the bombs drop, darling, can you say that you’ve lived your life? Oh, this is a high time for hypersonic missiles.” - Sam Fender - Hypersonic Missiles
Mallory
“It has to be soon, I can’t keep this up in front of Len
nox, even if he deserves it,” I tell Aria as we plot and scheme from my tiny flat.
“You don’t want to be even more of a hypocrite, you mean?” She mumbles at me and sashays her head.
“You’re supposed to be here to be supportive, not reasonable and mature,” I put my hands on my hips. “You were never this big of a fan of David, you know.”
“David is not the hottest man alive. Lennox Gibbes is,” she retorts.
“I wish that were enough,” I sigh and my mood immediately sours. I’m like a fish out of water flopping back and forth between emotions these past two weeks. Angry, sad, angry, sad.
“I know, honey, I’m sorry,” she rushes to my side and hugs me. “I’m only saying, you have no proof that he really did cheat.”
“He has no proof that I slept with Digby, either, but here we are.” I sniffle into her shoulder.
“Two wrongs don’t make a right. Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?” She takes me by the shoulders and forces me to look at her, “Happy and in bed with that delicious man candy?”
“Don’t say candy,” I chuckle and think of Big Tits the nanny who lasted for twelve whole hours. “Besides, it doesn’t matter. If we can’t pull this off with Digby, Lennox will never be out from under this corruption. He’ll never be happy and it will all have been for nothing.”
Except for the memories. Despite everything, how much I hurt, I wouldn’t trade them. I would do it again, god help me.
“Well, then let’s get back to scheming.”
Aria flew over when I hit rock bottom after arriving home to Aylesbury. Lennox had told me he loved me, then he left me. The next forty-eight hours were bad. There was ugly crying and I am embarrassed to admit that in a moment of weakness, I got out of bed and tried to break into his flat desperate for anything of his to hold in my hands. I blamed sleep deprivation, but as soon as I told Aria about my B&E, she was on the next flight.
She brought me tea in bed and forced me to eat. She let me wallow until she’d deemed that the appropriate amount of time had passed, and then she dragged me up and made me take off Lennox’s clothes. We even burned the stupid Talker Distillery hoodie in the meadow out back in a wine-fueled feminine war cry. And then it became time to get to work on the mission at hand.
Operation Destroy Digby.
I have flirted, fawned, inappropriately pawed, giggled, batted my eyelashes, and led that pig on for nearly two weeks now. When he got suspicious, I posted photos of him and me on my social media knowing Lennox might see it. I said horrible things about Lennox to Digby that I did not mean. I hope when this all goes down, Lennox will hate me a little less and know what I was really doing.
The door buzzer interrupts Aria and me and we shoot one another a knowing glance.
“Hello?” I speak into the security unit on the wall.