Looking Inside

Eleanor’s heart had started charging when Trey had said matter-of-factly near her ear that he planned to figure out the mystery of her. Why had she broken the role? She should have dressed more seductively and put on some makeup before they went out. She’d had the chance.

The truth was, she’d grown hopeful there in the condo. He’d seemed attracted to her, even when she’d been sweaty and disheveled. She’d given in to a romantic notion that maybe, just maybe, he’d like her without all the theatrics.

And that’s a pretty dangerous hope to be having, isn’t it?

That’s not what this thing with Trey was supposed to be about, what is? No, it was supposed to be about taking that greedy bite out of life she’d promised her

self she’d take following Caddy’s death. Still, it was only a matter of time before he figured out she was nowhere near as daring and bold as she’d pretended to be to get his attention. Sometimes, she thought he already knew. Part of her expected him to call her out at any second and walk away for good.

She glanced over at him furtively as they walked, and he caught her looking. His grin melted her insides. It was the kind of smile that just made you want to let go and relish the moment. Jimmy had been right. She needed to stop overthinking this.

They made their way down a crowded Michigan Avenue, Eleanor absorbing the pretty holiday scene. When she’d realized earlier that the lights and Christmas decorations were up already, a feeling of sadness had swept through her for a moment. She, Caddy and Caddy’s best friend, Sandra Banks, who lived nearby on Oak Street, had a tradition of attending the Christmas lighting parade every year. Afterward, they’d drop in on a few stores and then cap off their festive evening with a drink at the Four Seasons bar. It’d been weird, seeing the street all cheerily lit up. It’d been a harsh reminder that life went on, with or without Caddy.

With or without her—Eleanor.

The bustling, festive mood on the street quickly dissolved her melancholy. That, and the man at her side. Tourists and locals flocked the sidewalks and poured in and out of the stores, taking advantage of early Christmas sales and the extended holiday weekend. It seemed strange for her, to be out in public, walking hand in hand with such a handsome, exciting man.

Strange and wonderful.

She’d been startled when he’d grabbed her hand earlier. Holding hands in public seemed so sweet. Romantic. Innocent. She’d have thought he wasn’t interested in such a vanilla display, but she’d been thrilled he was. She recalled what he’d said about being a basic Midwestern boy at heart. Could it be true?

Then she remembered that the very hand that grasped hers so innocently that very moment had previously spanked her ass until it burned hot last night and worked explosive magic between her legs. Arousal flashed through her at the mere memory.

No, Trey was anything but a simple farm boy.

A horde of rowdy teenage girls swarmed against them, causing them to break hands and go around them. Trey was so tall, it was easy to see his head above the crowd. She returned his grin when they joined up again, captivated by his gleaming blue eyes. Her hand went out, and his was there, ready to grasp it. She ducked her chin, embarrassed at the flood of pleasure that went through her from the simple act of holding his hand in public. If she didn’t watch it, he was going to recognize that she was as giggly and goofy as those teenage girls they’d just passed, and then where would she be?

As they neared the Chicago River, a harsh wind whisked down Michigan Avenue. She shivered, and Trey noticed. He herded her inside to the atrium of a vertical mall.

“It’s getting colder. Button up your coat. Do you like hot chocolate?”

She nodded eagerly. In truth, it was a favorite of both hers and Caddy’s since they were kids.

“Whipped cream?”

“Oh yeah.”

His grin told her he’d anticipated her answer. She usually compensated for her guilty pleasure by getting the sugar-free, low-fat hot cocoa, but it seemed like a very good night to splurge.

“Wait here, I’ll be back in two seconds,” he said before he sprung up a flight of stairs, his black coat billowing out behind his long body. When he returned, he held two hot chocolates in his hands. She couldn’t repress her grin. They stood face-to-face, sipping the hot, creamy ambrosia for a few moments while shoppers streamed around them, each of them as lost in her or his own world as Eleanor was in Trey’s eyes.

“I know of a nice, casual little Italian place close to where I work. It won’t be so crowded down in the Loop,” Trey said loudly over a bell-ringing Santa Claus once they’d returned to the sidewalk. “But you said you were hungry earlier, and it’s still quite a way if we walk. Do you want to grab a cab?”

“I’ll be fine. Let’s walk there,” she insisted. Was he kidding? How could I not be fine, walking down the street with you, hand in hand? She could walk all the way to central Illinois in the mood she was in, if he was by her side.

They approached the Michigan Avenue Bridge and she glanced down over the balustrade to the river. She saw a sign posted on the stairs leading down to the quay. “Oh look. This is the last weekend for the Water Taxi before it closes for the winter. I always wanted to take it, but never have.”

“It has a drop-off close to the restaurant we’re going to. I should warn you, though, it’ll probably take longer than walking. It’s slower than dirt, and they make every stop, even though no one is interested in being on the river in late November.”

“But us?” she asked hopefully. She loved the sound of his low, rough laughter.

“But us,” he agreed, pulling on her hand and leading her down the stairs.

They were indeed the only passengers on the large water taxi. Trey had been right. It was chillier on the water than up on the street, and people didn’t even consider a boat for transportation this time of year.

They found refuge from the wind in the indoor portion on the upper deck as the water taxi pulled away from the quay. “Over here,” Eleanor called out to him. “There’s a heater on the floorboard. It’s nice and warm.”

They sat side by side on a polished wooden bench, Eleanor clutching her still-hot cup of chocolate to warm her hands. Windows surrounded them on all sides, making her feel like they glided in their own private atrium with a panoramic view of the glittering city all around them. She twisted her head and looked out the window over Trey’s shoulder.