The Boyfriend Arrangement

Ouch. Okay. “I’d really appreciate it.”

Harper smiled and headed toward the elevator with him in her wake.

Sebastian hadn’t been sure what kind of reception he would receive after the way they’d parted at the hospital. So far, it had been pretty neutral, but he was going up to her apartment. She could’ve just turned him away. That was something.

Running into his arms and kissing him would’ve been another option, but he may not deserve that. He had a lot of apologizing to do before hugs and kisses would be on the agenda. Her semi-frosty reception proved that much.

When they stepped into her apartment, Sebastian got his first real dose of what Harper’s life was like. It was a nicer place than he had—a remnant of her old life—decorated with some familiar and inexpensive IKEA pieces. As she set her groceries in the kitchen, he noticed a nice bottle of champagne and a couple pouches of ramen noodles. He supposed she had learned balance over the years.

Sebastian hovered awkwardly at the entrance of the kitchen as she put away her groceries. He was waiting for the invitation to talk, but she hadn’t given him one yet. He wanted to sit and look her in the eye, not try to apologize while she was distracted with chores.

Finally she folded the paper sack and looked at him. “Do you want a drink? I want a drink.”

“I’m not really supposed to,” he admitted. He really wanted one—it would ease the tension—but he was working on a new healthy lifestyle. Day drinking two weeks into the plan would doom him to failure. “Some water would be great, though.”

She eyed him for a moment before she nodded and pulled two bottles of water out of the fridge. She handed him one and pointed to the wall. “Let’s head into the living room. People always congregate in the kitchen and I hate that.”

Sebastian backed out of her way and followed her lead into the open and airy living room. She had comfy couches, a few nice pieces of art he recognized and a decent-size, flat-screen television on a shelf. There was a wall of books on one side of the room and a wall of windows on the other. From where he was, he could spy a glimpse of green—Central Park—a few blocks away.

“Have a seat,” she said as she settled onto the couch.

He opted for the oversize chair just to her right, facing her. Their knees almost touched as they sat, but he kept his joints to himself for the moment, no matter how badly he wanted to touch her. “Thanks for talking to me, Harper.”

She shrugged and opened her water. “The last time I saw you, you were on death’s door. I was hoping to hear you were doing better.”

“I am,” he said proudly. “I’ve been going to cardiac rehab three times a week and they’ve started me on a new lifestyle program that will make me more mindful of what I eat and how much rest I get. It’s made a huge difference already.”

Harper listened to him talk but nothing more than a casual interest lit her eyes. “I’m glad to hear that.”

“Me, too. Going forward, I know I can’t let my work overtake my life. I want more than a career and a string of patents under my belt. I want a life, too. A wife. Maybe a family.”

That got her attention. She sat more upright in her seat, her brows knitting together in thought. “That’s a big change for a workaholic bachelor. What’s going to keep you from losing yourself in your work again and this time ignoring your new family instead of just your health?”

She didn’t think he could change. “I’m not going to ignore you, Harper. I couldn’t possibly.”

“I didn’t mean me,” she said. “I just meant in general. Old habits die hard. Like keeping secrets. Trust me, I know.”

“I’m sorry I lied to you. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust you with the different aspects of my past. I was just...embarrassed. You understand that, don’t you?”

“Of course. But I told you everything, Sebastian. You told me almost nothing.”

“If you hadn’t been blackmailed by Josie, would you still have told me? Or was it only out of necessity?”

The self-righteous expression on her face softened a little. Her gaze dropped to the cap of her water bottle as she fidgeted with it. “And then I find myself clutching your unconscious body in the middle of a parking lot, screaming. When the ambulance arrives, I can’t tell them your medical information. I can’t say if you have a history of cardiac problems. I know literally nothing. You could’ve died and there was nothing I could do to help.”

“I shouldn’t have put you in that position. I never dreamed it would happen again or I would’ve said something.”

Harper nodded. “I understand we started off with the whole fake relationship thing, but that’s over. The wedding trip is over and now this is real life, Sebastian. Real feelings. We’re not playing a game any longer. I need to know the truth.”

“About what?”

“About everything. I want to know everything you’ve been keeping from me before I can consider continuing this relationship.”

“Right now? You just want me to lay out my whole life story right now?” He had an engagement ring burning a hole in his pocket. He was desperate to hear her say yes and move forward, but Harper wasn’t having it.

She sat back against the couch cushions, making herself visibly more comfortable. “Do you have somewhere you need to be, Sebastian? Work, perhaps? It’s a Saturday, but who knows with you.”

“No,” he insisted. “There’s nowhere I need to be but right here, right now. I’ll tell you whatever you want to know if it will make you feel more comfortable in loving me. Because I love you, Harper. I’ve never let myself love a woman before. I’m not sure I’m going to do things right, but I can’t help how I feel. I’ll do anything you want me to if it means you’ll tell me that you love me, as well.”