I dropped my head and gazed at the floor. “I feel so fucking stupid,” I whispered back.
“Hey, no. No.” She grabbed my arm and pulled me away from Olympia’s door. “There’s no way you could have known. The first one often comes on with little warning, and even if she did have any signs that it was on its way, I doubt she’d even know what they were.”
“It doesn’t matter,” I replied. “How could I be so unprepared, Adelaide? I’ve failed her.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX – ADELAIDE
The pain in his eyes cut me to my core.
Failed her?
How could he possibly think he’d failed her? Just because he didn’t know?
“Hey, no, Alexander.” I placed my hand on his cheek and made him look at me. “You haven’t failed her. She came to you even though she was worried and scared. The fact that she trusts you enough to tell you these things means you haven’t failed her in the slightest.”
He sighed, dropping his gaze. “So why does it feel like it?”
“Because being a parent is hard?” I smiled sadly. “I don’t know. It’s not like I am one, but…” I took hold of his hand and pulled him over to the top of the stairs where I sat down. I peered up at Alex until he rocked his head to the side and dropped to the top stair next to me. “I know this part is hard,” I said after a moment. “I mean, I was a preteen girl at one point.”
“Really? I’m shocked.”
I swatted his thigh with my hand. “I’m sorry to tell you it’s all downhill from here. As soon as the period hits, it goes to shit.”
He glanced at me, a small smile playing with his lips. “Thank you for your support.”
“Always.” I laughed a little. “I suppose when you don’t know something or can’t place it then it might well feel like you’ve failed, but you haven’t. She’s happy, she’s healthy, and she loves and trusts you. There’s not really much more you can win at there.”
Alex nodded slowly, and he reached over and linked his fingers through mine. “You’re right, of course.”
“I usually am. It’s both a blessing and a curse.”
He rubbed his thumb over the back of my hand. “I don’t think I was ready for this just yet, that’s all.”
“It’s a big one,” I agreed. “But she’ll be okay. She’ll learn how to manage it and recognise the signs that it’s coming, and the only way you’ll know is because she’ll be crying over bread adverts on the television and eating her weight in carbs and chocolate.”
He grimaced. “That sounds terribly exciting.”
“Depends if you like occasionally hysterical teenage girls who binge-eat for forty-eight hours approximately every four weeks.”
“Can’t say it’s something I’ve ever aspired to.”
“Ah, well, I guess it’s your unlucky day.”
He laughed quietly, squeezing my hand. “How do you do that?”
I turned my head to look at him. “Do what?”
“Cheer me up like that. Ten minutes ago, it felt as though my world was collapsing around me—”
“That’s a little dramatic.”
“—And now it’s like it never happened. How did you do that?”
“It’s quite simple. I distracted you with my stunning personality and superior wit.” I grinned, nudging him with my elbow.
He slid his hand from mine and wrapped his arm around my shoulders, pulling me into his side. I rested my head on his shoulder, leaning into him. Alex pressed his lips against my forehead and held them there for a moment, sending a warm burst of energy through my body that tugged at my heart.
“Thank you,” he murmured, resting his cheek on top of my head.
“For what?”
“For being you.”
“You’re welcome. I am quite good at it.”
“You really are.”
“Do you want to play chess?”
Alex laughed. “You want to play chess?”
“I don’t want to, per se, but I suspect kicking my arse at it will make you feel better.” I lifted my head and smiled at him. “Come on. I just have to bring Oly some water and a paracetamol, then I’ll meet you in the library.”
“All right.” He stood up first, then turned and held out his hands to help me up.
I was two steps higher than he was, and for the first time, I was just as tall as he was. “Thank you.”
“Well, you cheered me up. It was the least I could do.” He winked and turned around, preceding me down the stairs.
We turned off in opposite directions—him to the library, me to the kitchen. I fetched everything Olympia needed, checked in on her, and left her to curl up in her bed with her games console.
Apparently, Pokémon were all the rage again.
It made me feel a little old, to be honest.
It also made me wonder if it was acceptable to play it at almost thirty.
Well, I knew what my birthday present to myself was this year.