“You should know this by now!” Trav calls after him. “Always fun seeing you.”
“Fuck off,” Rodriguez’s fading voice says.
I turn to Saint. “They really are entertaining.”
Trav’s hard eyes meet mine. “War room. Now.”
I gulp audibly. “We can explain.” But can we?
“I think I’ve got the gist. Either way, we need to address it before things get out of hand.”
We follow him through the house and into the war room, and from the outside, I’m sure we look like schoolboys being led to the principal’s office. If, you know, they were caught fucking on school grounds.
“I’ll do the talking,” I mutter to Saint.
Trav stands by the door, holding out his arm for us to go first.
“We didn’t mean for it to happen,” Saint blurts before we’re even seated.
Way to let me handle it.
“Uh, twice,” I add and plop myself into a chair.
Saint sits next to me, and then Trav slides in opposite us.
He clasps his hands together on the tabletop. “I was under the impression you two had this whole frenemies vibe going on, not some decade-long pining—”
“It’s not that,” I say.
“Sounded like it to me.” Trav leans back in his seat. “If it’s not that, then what is it?”
“You want us to define something that has literally just happened? We …” I glance at Saint. “I don’t know what this is, only that it was strong enough for me to break your rules. And the thing is, I’m not even sorry. I wish I had told you sooner, maybe before anything had happened, but I thought I had it under control. Then, after the first time, I thought he was out of my system. But then today—”
Saint cuts me off. “It’s been adrenaline mixed with trauma and confusing feelings because Iris was the one who saved me. It’s a savior complex, nothing else.”
Okay, ouch. He thinks this is hero worship?
Trav does that intimidating assessing stare he gets that still terrifies me to this day. “If that’s how you want to play this, then that’s okay with me, but if I find out you two are still screwing around after this, that’s the end for both of you. Or, maybe you can try being honest and up-front with me, and then I can try to work something out.”
Saint’s gaze darts from Trav’s to mine with his lips parted.
“I wanted to tell you because I don’t think I can say with any certainty that it won’t happen again. But maybe Saint isn’t on the same page like I thought.” I glance at Saint’s reaction out of the corner of my eye.
“I …” Saint frowns. “I’m … confused.”
Trav leans forward. “Which brings me to another point we need to address. What happened today?”
“I froze. For a moment. It was just a moment,” Saint says.
“A moment that meant the difference between you climbing over a railing twenty floors up or simply walking out the front door,” Trav says.
“I-I, uh …” Saint looks at me. “I thought I was ready, but maybe I’m not. I’ve been having small bouts of what Iris thinks is PTSD, and maybe he’s right. Or maybe I still don’t have closure on my mission. I thought today would be easy, but it was harder than I was expecting, and—”
“It’s okay,” Trav says. “Today was a test run on a job that was probably a dead end. It’s why I thought it was the right one to start you out on, but it’s obvious it might be too soon or maybe you were too close to the target. We can find you something else to do.”
“I was thinking about that on the way back here,” I say. “Today, in the car, he didn’t crack under the pressure, and I think it was because he was guiding me where to go and what to do without being in the driver’s seat. And I know Ghost has been wanting to do more. He’s usually the one stuck behind a computer because it’s his specialty, but what if we put Saint behind the tech desk for a while? Just until he’s ready to get back into the action.”
Trav’s lips purse. “Would you be okay with that?” he asks Saint.
I see the moment where it’s like the responsibility lifts off his chest. “That actually sounds perfect, but …” He eyes me again. “You’re not firing me? Or us? I messed up twice today—”
“Everyone makes mistakes, but it’s important that we learn from them. Remember when I told you I’m only ever the bad guy if you make me one? Making a mistake is human nature. Continually doing it and going behind my back, that’s when you’re the asshole.” Trav stands. “You two can keep seeing each other or doing whatever it is you’re doing. I’ll put Saint on tech with Ghost for a while to make sure he knows what he’s doing before we have him on solo jobs, and then if and when you’re ready to get back in the field, while this is going on”—he waves a finger between us—“you won’t be put on jobs together.”