“I’m just… I don’t…. Mom. I’m scared and I don’t know why.”
“Of course you are,” she said. “I would be worried if you weren’t. It’s a big day. Anybody would be. But you know what I think?”
“What?”
“That while you’re scared, there is a bigger part of you that knows this is what you want, more than anything else. That Vince is what you want. You may think you have doubts, but sweetheart, doubts are not the same as fears. You can be scared, but so long as you believe in him, in what you two have, then everything will be just fine.”
I deflated against her, and she wrapped her arms around my neck while I laid my forehead against her shoulder. “Thanks, Mom,” I mumbled.
“Anytime,” she whispered. “And if it makes you feel better, I just came from telling Vince the same thing while he was on the phone with Darren, sending him over to check. He’s scared too, but there is nothing he wants more than you. And for what it’s worth, he looks good. If I was twenty years younger and not married to your father—hell, even if I wasn’t twenty years younger—I’d be tempted to take that out for a test drive.”
“Oh God,” I groaned. “Why would you say that?”
“I’d probably do the same,” Dad said, coming up beside us and squeezing my shoulder.
“You guys are the absolute worst.”
“We love you too,” Mom said. “Now, I just wanted to see you… before.” She pulled away from the hug, running her hands across my chest, fiddling with my tie. I saw the way her bottom lip was quivering, and I had to look away before I got choked up. “Just to say how proud I am of you.” She sniffled and then laughed wetly. “If you had told me the day I was pushing you out that I’d be this happy, I would have believed you, because even then, even when you were taking your time in my vagina, I knew you were going to be something special.”
“I love you,” I said seriously, “but that was the grossest thing you’ve ever said to me. Mom. What the hell.”
A tear trickled down her cheek. “I’m allowed to say what I want. My son’s getting married to my other son.”
“Still need to work on that phrasing,” Dad said lightly.
“That’s what I tell my friends at the bridge club,” Nana said. “And I don’t bother to correct their assumptions. It’s hysterical. They think we’re all inbred.”
“Now that that’s all squared away,” Sandy said, “Matty, you need to go back over with Vince since he’s walking first. Corey, Nana, and I need to get up to the front so everyone can stare and see how good we all look.”
“Represent,” Nana said.
Mom hugged me again, cooing that I would always be her baby boy even as she wiped her eyes. Corey and Nana kissed my cheek. Sandy held on for a long time before leaving without saying another word.
Then it was just me and my father.
“You trust me?” Dad asked, taking my hand in his and bumping his shoulder against mine.
“Yeah,” I said. “Always.”
“And you know that being a parent means that I will always want what’s best for you.”
“I know.”
“Then you can trust me when I say that Vince is what’s best for you,” he said, squeezing my hand. “I’m just going to say one thing, and then we’ll go. I figure it’s my duty as your dad.”
I nodded, unsure of where this was going.
He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Being a dad is… the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me, next to your mother. The day you were born, I promised you that I would do anything within my power to make sure you were the happiest little boy that ever lived. All I wanted for you was to know what love was, to know that you were loved, and to teach you how to love others. And you did. You had us. And then one day you had Sandy. And Corey. And it was good. For a long time, it was good. But then it changed into something more. And I knew it for what it was. Do you remember that day when your mother and I found you and Vince on your first da
te downtown?”
“Yeah,” I said hoarsely. “You said he was my Dom.”
“Well, you were sitting on his lap and he did seem awfully possessive of you. I’m still not convinced you’re not a horse or whatever it is—”
“Dad.”
“Right. But I saw it, Paul. Even then. You were happy before. Mostly. But I still thought maybe sometimes you were sad. And I didn’t want you to be sad. As a parent, it’s one of the worst things when your kid is sad and you don’t know how to fix it. And then Vince came and it was….” He let out a shuddering breath. “It was good because he did what I couldn’t do. I could do my best to build your happiness as your dad, but Vince was able to come in and complete it. And that’s all I could have ever asked for. I am so proud of you, Paul. For everything that you are. And I know that you’re in good hands. Vince belongs to us just as much as you do. And I thank God every day you found each other.”